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    Sunday Funnies

    One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship…
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    Upset Wagon

    It seems a farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn. The farmer who lived…
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    Look Like Mom

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    Airport Security

    Working as a secretary at an international airport, my sister had an office adjacent to…
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    Application To Date My Daughter

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    Tax Forms

    It was April and Tax Day was looming when an elderly woman showed up at my desk at the…
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    Collect Call

    My mother was away all weekend at a business conference.During a break, she decided to…
  • map forest

    Wilderness Guide

    "We pass this way but once," we have heard it said. But my wife has learned that, unless…
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    Change Reply

    Corporal Conroy needed to use a pay phone, but didn't have change for a dollar. He saw…
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    Wake Up Call

    One night at an economy motel, I ordered a 6 a.m. wake-up call. The next morning, I awoke…
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    Jean Squeeze

    A woman had gained a few pounds. It was most noticeable to her when she squeezed into a…
  • roller coaster

    The Difference of a Year

    Our seven-year-old daughter was thrilled when we took her to Disney World for the first…
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    Zoo Trip

    Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally his…
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    Seeing Eye Dogs

    Two men are walking their dogs. The first guy has a doberman, and the second guy has a…
  • Race horses talking in the stable

    Race Horses in a Stable

    Some race horses are staying in a stable when one of them starts to boast about his track…

cat lying downPolitically correct terms for cat owners:

- My cat does not barf hairballs, he is a floor/rug re-decorator.

- My cat does not break things, she helps gravity do its job.

- My cat does not fear dogs, they are merely sprint practice tools.

- My cat does not gobble, she eats with alacrity.

- My cat does not scratch, he is a furniture/rug/skin ventilator.

- My cat is not a "shedding machine," she is a hair relocation stylist.

- My cat is not a "treat-seeking missile," she enjoys the proximity of food.

- My cat is not a chatterbox, she is advising me on what to do next.

- My cat is not a dope addict, she is catnip appreciative.

- My cat is not a ruthless hunter, she is a wildlife control expert.

- My cat is not evil, she is badness enhanced.

- My cat is not fat, he is mass enhanced.

- My cat is not hydrophobic, she has an inability to appreciate moisture.

- My cat is not underfoot, she is shepherding me to my next destination
(which should always be the food dish).

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