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    Goober Nails

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Mouse Repellant

    A couple moved to the country when they retired. One mild winter, they had a bit of a…
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    Shy Visit To The Dentist

    A shy little 4-year-old came in to the dentist for his first cleaning and check-up. The…
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    Computer Customer Quotes

    "Computer Customer Quotes" or "Why goobers shouldn't own computers!" Customer: "I have…
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    Diet Skipping

    Mr. Lee was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. "I want you to eat…
  • How to be handy around the house - in 10 easy steps.

    Ten Step Guide to Being Handy Around the House

    1. If you can't find a screwdriver, use a knife. If you break off the tip, it's an…
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    Horse Woes

    Two cowboy friends, Wally and Dallas, each bought a horse one summer. They enjoyed riding…
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    Bathroom Sign

    Thanks to Norma K. Appel for sending today's CleanLaugh. Dear Pastor Tim, this is a true…
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    Typo Apology

    "We apologize for the error in the last edition, in which we stated that 'Mr Fred Nicolme…
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    Key West Tourists

    I was a salesman and always wore a shirt and tie which made me stand out in Key West.…
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    Bridge Trouble

    A truck driver was driving along on the freeway when a sign comes up that reads "Low…
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    Burning Call

    A screenwriter comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing and slightly-singed wife is…
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    Grasping Challenge

    When my daughter was about four years old, she still had a hard time grasping the concept…
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    Counting the Days

    A fellow cop from our precinct had only a few months left on the job, and he could always…
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    Planning Ahead

    A woman decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond…

A businessman on his deathbed called his friend and said, "Bill, I want you to promise me that when I die you will have my remains cremated."

"And what," his friend asked, "do you want me to do with your ashes?"

The businessman said, "Just put them in an envelope and mail them to the Internal Revenue Department and write on the envelope, "Now you have everything including me."

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