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More Jokes

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    Bank Hiccups

    While waiting in line at the bank, a co-worker developed a very loud case of hiccups. By…
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    Just Like Mother

    Manny was almost 29 years old. Most of his friends had already gotten married, and Manny…
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    How High Is It?

    An Engineering Student, a Physics Student, and a Mathematics student were each given $150…
  • picture of hurricane evacuation sign route

    Florida Hurricane Advice

    We're about to enter the peak of the hurricane season. Any day now, you're going to turn…
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    Raise Refusal

    For many years I worked as a receptionist and switchboard operator at a busy company.…
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    Boys In Hospital

    The two young boys were discussing their ailments together in the children's ward."Are…
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    Teacher Tech Help

    The computer in my high school classroom recently started acting up. After watching me…
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    Putting the Cat Out

    A couple is going out for an evening on the town.When they are almost ready to go, the…
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    House Call

    Old Dr. Carver still made house calls. One afternoon he was called to the Tuttle house.…
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    Two Plus Two

    A mathematician, a statistician and an accountant apply for the same job. The interviewer…
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    The English Language

    Lets face itEnglish is a stupid language.There is no egg in the eggplantNo ham in the…
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    Goober Travelers

    The following are actual stories provided by travel agents: * I had someone ask for an…
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    Interpreting Hotel Brochures

    Old world charm ............. No bathTropical .................... RainyMajestic setting…
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    Colorful Grandma

    I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I…
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    Punctuation

    A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher.…

1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood.

2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

3. Sorry to have missed you, but I'm at the doctor's having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.

4. I will be unable to delete all the e-mails you send me until I return from vacation. Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

5. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

6. The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection. Your message has not been delivered. Please restart your computer and try sending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see who did this over and over and over....)

7. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

8. Hi, I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.

9. I've run away to join a different circus.

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