logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Best 'Out of Office' Automatic Email Replies

1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood.

2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

3. Sorry to have missed you, but I'm at the doctor's having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.

4. I will be unable to delete all the e-mails you send me until I return from vacation. Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

5. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

6. The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection. Your message has not been delivered. Please restart your computer and try sending again. (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see who did this over and over and over....)

7. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

8. Hi, I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.

9. I've run away to join a different circus.

Powered By JFBConnect

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    The Patch

    During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed his…
  • Default Image

    Utensil Rejection

    My friend Ann and I were eating at a Chinese restaurant. When an elderly waiter set…
  • Default Image

    Shower or Tub

    New Englanders are known for their dry wit and logic.Once in Martha's Vineyard a hotel…
  • Default Image

    Horseshoe Look

    One day a cowboy walked into a blacksmith shop and picked up a horseshoe, not realizing…
  • Default Image

    Prescription Worries

    A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. "Is it true," she wanted to know,…
  • Default Image

    Random Jokes

    Want another random joke? Simply refresh this page or click here. Want another another…
  • teacher

    Meet Me For Lunch

    The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining…
  • Default Image

    How does a home schooler change a light bulb?

    Q: How does a home schooler change a light bulb? A: First, mom checks three books on…
  • Default Image

    Executive Approval

    For many years I worked as a receptionist and switchboard operator at a busy company.…
  • Default Image

    Something Nice For Dad

    Unable to attend the funeral after his father died, a son who lived far away called his…
  • Default Image

    Interesting thoughts

    It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost…
  • couple old

    Old Friends

    Amy and Judy are old friends. They have both been married to their husbands for a long…
  • fishing1

    Fishing Trip

    "So, what's the matter? I thought you just got back from a nice relaxing fishing trip…
  • Default Image

    Think She'll Die?

    One afternoon while I was visiting my library, I noticed a group of preschoolers gathered…
  • Default Image

    Other Uses for Fruitcake

    1. Paint a few white and place them outside on the grass so people won't park on your…