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    You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When

    You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When . . .* You can type sixty words a minute with…
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    Mr. Scwartz

    Mr. Schwartz was the oldest of 7 children, so he had to quit school and work to help…
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    Hymns for Speeders

    Now, for those who speed on the highway - a few hymns for you: 45 mph.................God…
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    Top Ten things Men Understand about Women

    1.2.3.4.5.6.7.8.9.10. Just smile and pass it on!
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    Peter's Portrait

    One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis,…
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    Transcribing Confusion

    We were thoroughly confused. While transcribing medical audiotapes, my co-worker came…
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    Pet Hotline

    The Iams Pet Professionals, a team of 30 trained customer service representatives at The…
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    Military Computer

    Officers at a military installation were being lectured about a new computer. The…
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    Think She'll Die?

    One afternoon while I was visiting my library, I noticed a group of preschoolers gathered…
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    After Me

    "I have to have a raise," the man said to his boss. "Three companies are after me." "Is…
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    Five Tech Replies

    Five things you don't want to hear from Tech Support: 1. "Duuuuuude! Bummer!" 2. "In…
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    Obituary Notice

    A woman goes into the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently…
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    Accident and Interview

    Thorn was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off…
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    Political Faith

    Politicians have a constant need to be diplomatic. Witness this candidate for the Senate…
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    Golf Quitter

    Two men were chatting casually at work over the water cooler. The conversation turned to…
* The parachute company says you'll get a full refund.

* They say the house didn't float very far at all.

* We're all amazed that you go on living each day.

* Well, at least the operation was a partial success.

* The "National Enquirer" just loved those pictures of you at work.

* The insects hardly touched your other eyebrow.

* The District Attorney says he only has a few more questions.

* Jerry Springer wants to surprise you on his show.

* The reward for your capture has reached fifty thousand dollars.

* At least we never thought you were guilty like that Jury did.

* The insurance pays the full book value ($312) for your 1956 T Bird.

* The thieves left the push lawn mower and hedge trimmers.

* Those Grand Juries always over-react. Don't worry about it.

* The boss said while you're sick, he'd do all your work personally.
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