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    Absent Minded Professor

    One of the world's greatest scientists was also recognized as the original absent-minded…
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    Helicopter Debate

    My cousin worked on the Alaska pipeline as a welder. He said helicopters were a big help…
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    Listen For The Word

    Our five-year-old son went to a church conference with my wife and me. He got restless,…
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    Things Mom Doesn't Want To Hear

    "Mom's List Of Things She Does Not Want To Hear"1. I swallowed the goldfish.2. Your…
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    Melanie is Watching

    One day while driving with my then 4 year old daughter Melanie, I beeped the horn by…
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    School Excuse

    At the school where my mother worked, the two first-grade teachers were Miss Paine and…
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    Cell Phone Find

    An employee of the airport found a cell phone in one of the boarding areas. She switched…
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    Inferior Bags

    It was very crowded at the supermarket, and the customer in front of me had a large…
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    Eat This Up

    Several American nurses were training at a hospital in Liverpool, England. These nurses…
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    Suck It In

    I noticed my husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his ample stomach.…
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    Perfect

    There was a perfect man who met a perfect woman. After a perfect courtship, they had a…
  • Over-reacting to kidney stones

    Overreacting

    Early one morning, my husband, who works in a funeral home, woke me, complaining of…
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    Bob's Lesson

    Joe had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob went straight over to…
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    Goober with a Pager

    One of my friends works in the customer service call center of a national pager company.…
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    Yosemite Bears

    A married couple was vacationing in Yosemite. The wife expressed her concern about…

When your dad is mad and asks you, 'Do I look stupid?' Don't answer.

Never tell your Mom her diet's not working.

Stay away from prunes.

Don't pull Dad's finger when he tells you to.

Never let your three-year-old brother in the same room as your school assignment.

If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.

Felt-tip markers are not good to use as lipstick.

Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.

When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your Mom when she's on the phone.

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