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    Aerobic Dismay

    Concerned about fitness in my middle 40s, I enrolled in an aerobics class. To my dismay I…
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    The Envelope Please

    Morris had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high tech corporation. The CEO who…
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    You know you're growing old when..

    You know you're growing old when..You've come to the annoying realization that your…
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    Spelling Information

    "Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company." "Would you spell that,…
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    Knowing the Numbers

    The teacher asked one of her young students if he knew his numbers."Yes," he said. "I do.…
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    Goober Widow

    A woman brought an old picture of her dead husband, wearing a hat, to the photographer.…
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    Reindeer Gender

    According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeer…
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    Legal Contracts

    The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, "If you were to…
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    Wrapping Help

    My wife asked me to help wrap Christmas presents this year, but I was watching football…
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    Army Arrival

    My youngest brother, Tony had just completed Army basic training and was on leave prior…
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    White Hairs

    One day, a little girl is sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen…
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    New Pet

    A man was driving down a country road when he saw a baby pig along side the road. He…
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    Buffalo Comments

    Two buffalo were standing on the range when a passing tourist said, "Those are the…
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    Tense

    An English teacher at Michigan State University spent a lot of time marking grammatical…
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    Signs The Car You Bought Is A Lemon

    1. As you leave the used car lot, you see the owner rush out with a gigantic smile and…

My girlfriend called me as she was driving to an appointment. She arrived, and I could tell from her voice that she was getting frustrated. Finally she said, "I know I had my cell phone with me. And now I can't find it!"

I replied, "Aren't you talking on it!?"

There was a solid period of stunned silence as the reality of the situation sank in - followed by, "You are NOT going to tell anybody about this!"

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