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    Help Is Nearby

    My partner and I were in our police car when we were dispatched to break up a domestic…
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    Genetically Modified Food

    Signs that scientists have gone too far with genetically modified food: *Your hot dog…
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    Ever Riden a Honda?

    A biker is riding a new motorcycle on the highway. While passing a car, he knocks on the…
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    Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear A Dad Say

    10. Well, how 'bout that? I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions.…
  • cat on roof

    Your Cat's New Year's Resolutions

    My human will never let me eat their pet hamster, and I am at peace with that. I will not…
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    Tag Fad

    My teenager was headed to school one morning when I told him that the neck tag on his…
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    Goober Border Patrol

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:…
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    Washing Settings

    One day, a housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he…
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    Strangest Recording

    I got the strangest recording when I called the phone company the other day.It said, "You…
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    12 Reasons to be Thankful You Burned the Turkey

    1. Salmonella won't be a concern. 2. Everyone will think your turkey is Cajun blackened.…
  • public speaking

    PTA Speakers

    As a traffic safety consultant, I often gave talks to organizations on accident…
  • deer

    Deer Prayer

    The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season. The…
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    Small Town Check

    I had just moved from an apartment to a house in the same small town. One day at the…
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    Children Under Ten

    Mark Twain's contention was that the most interesting information comes from children,…
  • classroom

    Actual Elementary School Excuse Notes

    * "Jerry was at his grandmother's yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because…

~ March Planned For Next August

~ Blind Bishop Appointed To See

~ Lingerie Shipment Hijacked--Thief Gives Police The Slip

~ L.A. Voters Approve Urban Renewal By Landslide

~ Patient At Death's Door--Doctors Pull Him Through

~ Latin Course To Be Canceled--No Interest Among Students, Et Al.

~ Diaper Market Bottoms Out

~ Croupiers On Strike--Management: "No Big Deal"

~ Stadium Air Conditioning Fails--Fans Protest

~ Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped

~ Henshaw Offers Rare Opportunity to Goose Hunters

~ Teacher Strikes Idle Kids

~ Lawyers Give Poor Free Legal Advice

~ Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

~ Fund Set Up for Beating Victim's Kin

~ Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years

~ Never Withhold Herpes Infection From Loved One

~ Cancer Society Honors Marlboro Man

~ Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe Out Literacy

~ Autos Killing 110 a Day--Let's Resolve to Do Better

~ 20-Year Friendship Ends at Altar

~ War Dims Hope For Peace

~ If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last A While

~ Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

~ Half of U.S. High Schools Require Some Study for Graduation

~ Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn't Seen in Years

~ Man is Fatally Slain

~ Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Experts Say

~ Death Causes Loneliness, Feelings of Isolation

~ Defendants Speech Ends in Long Sentence

~ Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

~ House Passes Gas Tax Onto Senate

~ Police Discover Crack in Australia

~ Stiff Opposition Expected to Casketless Funeral Plan

~ William Kelly, 87, was Fed Secretary

~ Collegians are Turning to Vegetables

~ Scientists to Have Ford's Ear

~ Quarter of a Million Chinese Live on Water

~ Hershey Bars Protest

~ County Officials to Talk Rubbish

~ Carter Plans Swell Deficit

~ Caribbean Islands Drift to Left

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