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    Counting the Days

    A fellow cop from our precinct had only a few months left on the job, and he could always…
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    Sinner

    The preacher spent his whole sermon relating the evils of sin and how all men are sinners…
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    Ignored Phone

    The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the telephone when it…
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    Parrot Skills

    A man entered a pet shop, wanting to buy a parrot. The shop owner pointed out three…
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    Blind Date

    After being with his blind date all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with…
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    Goober Travelers

    The following are actual stories provided by travel agents: * I had someone ask for an…
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    Coverup Catch

    This guy had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without…
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    Without Glasses

    Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the…
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    Three Gifts

    Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. They discussed the gifts they…
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    Tracing Family

    Dear Abby:I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to…
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    The Night of Thanksgiving

    And after all is said and done.....the kitchen cleaned up, the football game is over, the…
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    Kids' Instructions for Life

    Never trust a dog to watch your food. Patrick, Age 10 When you want something expensive,…
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    Ring Appraisal

    An acquaintance of mine whose daughter was about to be married decided to give her a…
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    Understanding Your Paycheck

    Gross pay: $1222.02 Income Tax Outgo Tax State Tax Interstate Tax244.40 45.21 61.10 5.89…
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    Real Answers

    These, are real answers given by children.Q: Name the four seasons.A: Salt, pepper,…

The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there. "Please," protested the college President, "you already make more than the entire History department."

"Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with," the coach blustered. "Look." He went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway. "Run over to my office and see if I'm there," he ordered. Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out of breath. "You're not there, sir," he reported.

"Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the President, scratching his head. "I would have phoned."

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