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  • wedding kids

    Perfect Spouse

    A young lady visited a computer dating service and requested, "I'm looking for a spouse.…
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    Hearing Request

    During a January revival an evangelist asked the people in line what they needed.One…
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    Top 10 Signs Your Vet Bill Is Going To Require Financing

    -- The doc's thermometer registers in Fahrenheit, Celsius and dollars. -- The bill came…
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    Oil on Fish

    Students at school were asked to write about the harmful effects of oil on fish.One…
  • chickens

    Prepared Chicken

    "May I take your order?" the waiter asked. "Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"…
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    Haircut Plan

    I was getting my hair cut at a neighborhood shop, and I asked the barber when would be…
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    Get Moving

    While driving with my granddaughter, I was getting annoyed with the driver ahead of me…
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    Lawyer Light Bulb Completion

    So many of you threatened to sue me if I didn't supply the end of yesterday's CleanLaugh,…
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    No Frills Airlines

    ...they don't sell tickets, they sell chances. ...all the insurance machines in the…
  • parrot

    Bilingual Parrot

    This guy goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. He sees one on a perch with a red string…
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    The Vending Machine

    A goober named Laura is at a local zoo and comes across a vending machine, which she has…
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    Bible Confusion

    The little girl was sitting with her grandmother, who had presented her with her first…
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    Patriotic Father

    On a recent trip to Washington, D.C., my brother-in-law overheard a patriotic father…
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    Message Puzzle

    April was puzzled recently by the odd messages she kept getting on her voice mail. Day…
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    Red Light - Green Light

    Ralph and his friend were driving through town when they came to a red light. Cruising…

The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there. "Please," protested the college President, "you already make more than the entire History department."

"Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with," the coach blustered. "Look." He went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway. "Run over to my office and see if I'm there," he ordered. Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out of breath. "You're not there, sir," he reported.

"Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the President, scratching his head. "I would have phoned."

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