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    Dishwashed Verse

    Helping his wife wash the dishes, a minister protested, This isn't a man s job.Oh yes, it…
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    A Brother Names the Babies

    A pregnant woman from Washington, D.C., (whose husband was out of the country) gets in a…
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    The Lord's Prayer - Sort of

    A mother was teaching her three-year-old The Lord's Prayer. For several evenings at…
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    More Newspaper Bloopers

    Dr. Benjamin Porter visited the school yesterday and lectured on "Destructive Pests". A…
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    And Then They Voted

    While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was…
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    Application

    An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you…
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    Goober Motivation

    One day a goober was hiking up to an old camp. There was an outhouse along the way, so he…
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    Tips rejected by Martha Stewart

    Old telephone books make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and…
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    Packing

    I was scheduled to fly from North Carolina to Germany, where my husband was stationed in…
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    Eggplant Sale

    A grocer put up a sign that read "Eggplants, 25ยข ea.--three for a dollar."All day long,…
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    Politically Correct Football

    The Politically Correct National Football League would like to announce its name changes…
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    Winter House

    We purchased an old home in Northern New York State from two elderly sisters. Winter was…
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    Johnny's Prayer

    Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room. After a while he emerged and…
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    Pet Hotline

    The Iams Pet Professionals, a team of 30 trained customer service representatives at The…

My husband and I had bought some gadgets for our almost teen-age grandsons and were leaving the store when we realized we didn't have batteries. He stepped over to a counter to get the batteries but couldn't attract the attention of the clerk.

I waited for a little while then said, "I'll get a clerk over here real fast." With that, I pulled out my pocket tape measure and started measuring a large TV set.

Amazingly, a clerk leap-frogged over several pieces of furniture to reach my side in jig time. To his "May I help you?" I said, "Of course. I'll take 8 of those batteries over there."

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