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More Jokes

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    Wrapping Talk

    A few days after Christmas last year, my six year old son and I were talking.He asked,…
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    Dog Barking Payback

    A wife and her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has…
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    Flood Prediction

    Meteorological experts predicted a massive flood that would destroy the world.The Pope…
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    Money Call

    A young man was having some money problems, and needed $200 to get his car fixed and…
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    What "Guy" Phrases Really Mean

    "I'm going fishing."really means..."I'm going to go and stand by a stream with a stick in…
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    Letter From Tooth Fairy

    Dear _________________ : Thank you for leaving one [1] tooth under your pillow last…
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    Pants Dilemma

    A young man came home from the office and found his bride sobbing convulsively. "I feel…
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    28 Ounce Water Pump

    A woman calls an import parts warehouse and asks for a 28-ounce water pump."A what?" says…
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    Toaster Oven

    One of my daughter's wedding presents was a toaster oven. Soon after the honeymoon, she…
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    12 Reasons to be Thankful You Burned the Turkey

    1. Salmonella won't be a concern. 2. Everyone will think your turkey is Cajun blackened.…
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    Isn't Aging Fun?

    Do you realize that the only time in our liveswhen we like to get old is when we're…
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    Goober Compensation

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    You Know You Are From Arizona When

    You no longer associate bridges or rivers with water.You can endure 110 degrees without…
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    Long Passwords

    My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on…
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    Rattlesnakes

    Felix, my husband, was playing golf with our town's fire chief when he hit a ball into…
The following notes from parents excusing their children from attending school have been around a while but if you haven't seen them, I'm sure you will get a kick out of them:

"Please excuse Freddie from being away yesterday because he had the fuel."

"Please accuse Michael from being absent on January 30 because he was aleing."

"George was absent yesterday because of a sore trout."

"Please excuse Betsey from being absent. She was sick and I had her shot."

"Joseph has been absent becuz he had two teeth taken off his face."

"My son is under doctor's care and should not take fisical education. Please execute him."

"Please excuse Ralph from school on Friday. He had very loose vowels."
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