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More Jokes

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    Interesting thoughts

    It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost…
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    Nativity Quiz

    A minister is visiting his children to celebrate Christmas. When he walks into the house,…
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    Translation Tries

    A Latin American minister was touring the U.S. in an effort to boost financial support…
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    Got Any Crackers

    A duck walks into a bar and asks "Got any crackers? "Bartender says no.Duck walks…
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    Removing The Dents

    A goober left his car out in a hail storm. When the storm was over he checked the car and…
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    Shower or Tub

    New Englanders are known for their dry wit and logic.Once in Martha's Vineyard a hotel…
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    Orchestra Note

    While a famous orchestra was on tour, the conductor found this note under his hotel room…
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    Actual Elementary School Excuse Notes

    * "Jerry was at his grandmother's yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because…
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    Turtle Ears

    Tradition here in the office is to keep a notepad with the punch lines from the various…
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    Not as Bad as They Say

    Thanks to my good, Texan friend Walter Smith for this one.Chuck was sitting in an…
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    I'll Call Back

    Leaving Montreal for Quebec, I decided to make a stop at one of those rest areas on the…
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    Innocent Question

    A prosecuting attorney just could not believe that a jury had found the defendant not…
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    Restaurant Line

    A well-put together, elderly gentleman left his Maserati Gran Turismo with the valet,…
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    Transcribing Confusion

    We were thoroughly confused. While transcribing medical audiotapes, my co-worker came…
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    The Same Taste

    Looking in the mall for a cotton nightgown, I tried my luck in a store known for its sexy…
The following notes from parents excusing their children from attending school have been around a while but if you haven't seen them, I'm sure you will get a kick out of them:

"Please excuse Freddie from being away yesterday because he had the fuel."

"Please accuse Michael from being absent on January 30 because he was aleing."

"George was absent yesterday because of a sore trout."

"Please excuse Betsey from being absent. She was sick and I had her shot."

"Joseph has been absent becuz he had two teeth taken off his face."

"My son is under doctor's care and should not take fisical education. Please execute him."

"Please excuse Ralph from school on Friday. He had very loose vowels."
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