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More Jokes

  • school-house

    Beginning School

    Tommy had reached school age. His mother managed with a blast of propaganda to make him…
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    Hymns vs. Choruses

    THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HYMNS AND PRAISE CHORUSES An old farmer went to the city one…
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    Enlisting Choices

    "Daddy," said my 11-year-old daughter, "I think I want to join the Army.""Baby," I…
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    Pearl Dream

    After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl…
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    Bank Line

    With only two tellers working at the bank, the line I was standing in was moving very…
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    Today I didn't Do It

    One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three…
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    Wake Up!

    A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the…
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    Speeding Juggler

    A driver was pulled over by a police officer for speeding. As the officer was writing the…
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    Bear Hunting Preacher

    A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday and head to the hills to do some…
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    The Turkey Shot Out Of The Oven

    The turkey shot out of the ovenand rocketed into the air,it knocked every plate off the…
  • puppies

    Puppy Mark

    An effusive client brought a litter of puppies to my veterinary clinic for inoculations…
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    Kettle Rescue

    A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what…
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    Pilot Pride

    As one of relatively few female airline pilots, I've often been mistaken for a flight…
  • child six

    Youngest in School

    A friend of mine has three boys. The youngest, Gregory, had just started school. A…
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    Swindled

    A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it.…

A man goes into a restaurant and the waitress stops him.

"Sorry sir, you need to wear a tie to enter".

So the man goes back to his car and looks around, but there's no necktie to be found.  So he takes his jumper cables, wraps them around his neck, ties a nice knot, and lets the ends dangle about.

He goes back to the restaurant, where the waiter says, "Well, OK, you can come in......   

....Just don't start anything."

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