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More Jokes

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    Obituary Notice

    A woman goes into the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently…
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    Late Arrival

    A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells "You should have been here at 8:30!"He…
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    Orchestra Note

    While a famous orchestra was on tour, the conductor found this note under his hotel room…
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    Dear Marty

    Dear Marty, I have been unable to sleep since I broke off your engagement to my daughter.…
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    Travel Deal

    A travel agent said to his customer, "I can get you three days and two nights in Rome for…
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    Permitted To Learn

    As an instructor in driver education at the local area High School, I've learned that…
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    Realistic Fishing Proverb

    Give a man a fish and he will eat all day. Teach a man to fish and he will go out and buy…
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    Hog Mark-up

    My wife and I were dining out at a nice restaurant. I overheard the couple at the next…
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    Quick Thinking Clerk

    There is a story about a new clerk in a supermarket. A customer asked him if she could…
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    100 GB

    Experts warned today of a new and deadly threat to our beleaguered civilization: the…
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    Mailbox Problem

    A friend asked me to replace the rotted post that her mailbox sat on, but to save the…
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    Public Servant Sentence

    "Write a sentence about a public servant," said the teacher. The small boy wrote, "The…
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    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary

    Excerpts from A Dog's Diary:Day number 1808:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!9:30 am…
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    Travel Agent Stories

    The following are actual stories provided by travel agents :1. I had someone ask for an…
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    Senior Driver

    As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.Answering, he heard…

What's for dinner?

Can't eat beef......mad cow

Can't eat chicken...... bird flu

Can't eat eggs..... possible Salmonella

Can't eat pork.....fears that bird flu will infect piggies. Also trichinosis

Can't eat fish....... heavy metals in the waters have poisoned their meat

Can't eat fruits and veggies....... insecticides and herbicides

Can't eat potatoes, pasta, bread, rice.......nasty carbs

Hmmmmmmmm! I believe that leaves.......Chocolate.

 

 

 

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