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More Jokes

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    Typing Test

    A soldier was asked to report to headquarters for assignment. The sergeant said: "We have…
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    Student Driver

    As an instructor in driver education at Unionville-Sebewaing Area High School in…
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    Doctor in the House

    A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, "Please, is there a doctor in…
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    Survivalist Training

    A Scoutmaster was teaching his Boy Scouts about survival in the Alaskan wilderness. "What…
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    How to Make Life Simpler

    Old telephone books make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and…
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    Kiss Good-bye

    "Dad," a teenaged girl says, running into her father's den, "I'd like to kiss you…
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    30 Minutes To A Cleaner House

    *30 Minutes To A Cleaner House* You're getting company in 30 minutes. Your house is a…
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    Ugly Baby

    A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, "That's the ugliest baby I've…
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    Hiring Slogans

    Beware of Companies With These Hiring Slogans:"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY": We have no…
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    Rare Steak

    A cattle rancher went into town on a Saturday night for a sit-down steak dinner. When the…
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    Stolen Turkey

    Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, Brian said, "Forgive me, Father, for I…
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    Fearless Leader

    As a professor at Texas A & M, I taught during the day and did research at night. I would…
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    Dressing The Kids

    The mother of a large family was explaining why she dresses her children alike, right…
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    Mummy Heart Failure

    An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket…

You know you're growing old when...

..you've come to the annoying realization that your parents were right about almost everything.

..the bag boy volunteers to help load groceries into your car ... in the "ten items or less" lane.

..you've stopped supporting your children, and started supporting your parents.

..you buy "age-defying" makeup and "anti-wrinkle" creams and believe they work.

..you've realized that all those geeky people in Bermuda shorts walking around Disney World include you.

..you've had three opportunities to buy every single Disney Animated Classic "for the last time in a generation."

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