phone handheld 2A couple of Goobers are out in the woods hunting when one of them falls to the ground.  He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are rolled back in his head.  The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.

Panic-stricken, he says to the operator, "I think Cletus is dead!  What should I do?"

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says, "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot rings out.

The goober comes back on the line and says, "OK, now what?"

(Wondering what a goober is? Check out www.cybersalt.org/policies/what-is-a-goober)