Monthly Archive

July 2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 1778 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Poppins Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5226
1 min read

Poppins Pun

Mary Poppins decides to grow some vegetables one year. When she picks her crop in the Autumn, her carrots, potatoes, onions and spring beans have all failed, but her cauliflowers have grown a treat.Sh... read more..
Potato Problem
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2310
<1min

Potato Problem

One evening, I went with my parents to a fancy restaurant. Dad was about halfway through his meal when he took a hard look at the potato, called the waitress over and said, "This potato is bad!" The w... read more..
Pottie Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2143
<1min

Pottie Pun

In order to move Porto-Potties, will you need a John Derek?... read more..
Prayer Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5229
<1min

Prayer Pun

A young woman went to her priest and asked him if it was all right for her to pray while she knit. The priest seeing a good opportunity to advance the theory of praying without ceasing replied that, y... read more..
Preacher Barber
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2988
2 min read

Preacher Barber

There was once a small rural community, so small, in fact, the only church in town is a small Baptist church whose pastor must also double up as the local barber to make ends meet.There happened to be... read more..
Presentation Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6819
<1min

Presentation Pun

Preparing for the most important presentation of his life, a sales rep went to a psychiatrist. "I'll implant a hypnotic suggestion in your mind," said the shrink. "Just say 'one-two-three,' and you'll... read more..
Priest Hole
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2390
<1min

Priest Hole

A priest rushed from church one day to keep a golf date. He was halfway down the first fairway, waiting to hit his second shot, when he heard the familiar "FORE!" and a ball slammed into his back.Soon... read more..
Priest Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
9691
<1min

Priest Pun

When a priest makes a mistake in church, it's a clerical error.... read more..
Prison
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
7852
<1min

Prison

Jimmy was sent to prison for his crimes but he told the warden he wasn't worried at all about serving his full term.The warden asked him why, since most prisoners immediately start planning how they c... read more..
Prison Break
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5564
<1min

Prison Break

The prison officer tells the warden, “Sir, I have to report that ten prisoners have broken out.”The alarmed warden says, “Blow the whistles, sound the alarms, alert the police.With a surprised look th... read more..
Prison Cupboards
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2510
<1min

Prison Cupboards

Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow inmates.The warden knew that, deep down, Andy was a good person. So, the warden m... read more..
Prison Library Books
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2713
<1min

Prison Library Books

THE GANGSTERS by Robin SteeleMY LIFE IN CRIME by Upton O. GoodeBAD MONEY by Count R. FitzYOU ALWAYS GET CAUGHT by Sue Nora Later... read more..
Promise
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3679
<1min

Promise

“Vowing to avoid poison ivy is making a rash promise.”... read more..
Proper Attire
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
10526
<1min

Proper Attire

Proper attire is required in the cafeteria at the University of Maine. To enforce that rule, the management posted this notice: "Shoes are required to eat in this cafeteria."Next to it, a student adde... read more..
Pullover Question
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2525
<1min

Pullover Question

Atlanta State trooper pulls over a pickup truck on I-75.He says to the driver, "Got any ID?"The driver says, "Bout what?"... read more..
Pumping Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5630
<1min

Pumping Pun

There was a man at a gas station, pumping gas into his truck. While pumping he got gas on his arm. He wiped some of it off, then forgot about it. He paid for his gas and got in the truck.As he was dri... read more..
Pumpkin Math
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2805
<1min

Pumpkin Math

Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of your pumpkin by its diameter?A: Pumpkin Pi... read more..
Pun Pun 1
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2350
<1min

Pun Pun 1

A good pun is its own reword.... read more..
Pun Pun 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3179
<1min

Pun Pun 2

The Head of The Church of Humor is the Puntiff.... read more..
Pup Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2453
<1min

Pup Pun

A father gave his teenage daughter an untrained pedigreed pup for her birthday.An hour later, while wandering through the house, he found her looking at a puddle in the center of the kitchen floor. "M... read more..
Putting
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
7404
<1min

Putting

A teacher was taking her first golf lesson. "Is the word spelled 'put' or 'putt'?" she asked the instructor."'Putt' is correct," he replied."'Put' means to place a thing where you want it. 'Putt' mean... read more..
Quarter Horse
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2400
<1min

Quarter Horse

One evening while I was preparing dinner, my daughter came into the kitchen asking for homework help on her vocabulary words. "Mom," she asked, "what's a quarter horse?"As I thought of a simple explan... read more..
Quarter Pun 1
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4216
<1min

Quarter Pun 1

The British threatened to draw and quarter George Washington if they caught him.Isn't it ironic that Americans drew him on a quarter?... read more..
Quartet Pun 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5662
<1min

Quartet Pun 2

While I was preaching in a church in Mississippi, the pastor announced that their prison quartet would be singing the following evening. I wasn't aware there was a prison in the vicinity and I looked ... read more..
Rabbi Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4462
<1min

Rabbi Pun

Once upon a time there was a village up in the mountains and in this village lived the Tibet Refugees Isolated from Danger, or TRIDs. Now, the TRIDs of this village had a problem. There was a giant wh... read more..
Racetrack
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3574
<1min

Racetrack

A racetrack is a place where the windows clean the people.... read more..
Radio City Music Hall
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2303
<1min

Radio City Music Hall

“There probably aren't many Jewish girls dancing at Radio City Music Hall, but it doesn't take a Rockette Zionist to figure that one out.“~ Gary Hallock... read more..
Rain Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5185
<1min

Rain Pun

Late one evening, while sitting and looking out their kitchen window somewhere in northern Russia, Rudolf and his wife Tanya were observing the inclement weather."This rain is going to make a mess out... read more..
Raise Request
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2299
<1min

Raise Request

"I have to have a raise," the man said to his boss. "There are three other companies after me.""Is that so?" asked the manager. "What other companies are after you?""The electric company, the telephon read more..
Raisin Bran Crime
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3309
<1min

Raisin Bran Crime

Two police officers respond to a crime scene behind a grocery store. The homicide detective is already there. "What happened?" asks the first officer. "Male, about twenty-five, covered in Raisin Bran ... read more..
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