Monthly Archive

2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 3574 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Fine Furniture
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3328
<1min

Fine Furniture

As the woman was instructing the new maid on the great care required in handling certain valuable household objects. She pointed to the dining room and said with great satisfaction, "That table goes b... read more..
Firefly
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4518
<1min

Firefly

A mother firefly and her brood were out for a walk. 'Whatever happens,' mom ordered, 'don't shine your light. I don't want you eaten by owls.'Sure enough, after a little while, she spotted the younges... read more..
Fish Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2432
<1min

Fish Pun

Q. What does a fish with out an eye look like?A. Fsh... read more..
Fisherman Books
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2374
<1min

Fisherman Books

WATERWAYS OF THE WORLD by Sue S. CanalA FISH STORY by Czar DeanCAUGHT IN THE FLOOD by Noah ZarkLITTLE FISHES by Anne Chovey... read more..
Fishing Pun 1
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
10691
<1min

Fishing Pun 1

Jim had an awful day fishing, sitting on the lake all day without a single bite. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, "Pick out the four ... read more..
Flat Cat
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2647
<1min

Flat Cat

Mr. Frobisher walked anxiously to the house and knocked. When a nice old lady answered, he said very sad, “I’m sorry, madam, but I have some bad news. “I’m afraid I have run over your cat. I… I would ... read more..
Flea
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
7345
<1min

Flea

Pet Store: "Buy one, get one flea."... read more..
Flies
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2772
<1min

Flies

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.... read more..
Floor Boards
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2701
<1min

Floor Boards

Did you hear about the Broadway actor who broke through the floor boards?He was just going through a stage.... read more..
Florist Problem
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3090
<1min

Florist Problem

Some monks were running low on funds, but didn't want to close up their monastery. After much consideration, they decided to start selling the flowers they grew. Soon after opening up shop, business b... read more..
Flu Differences
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2438
<1min

Flu Differences

What's the difference between Bird 'Flu and Swine 'Flu?For one you need Tweetment and for the other Oinkment.... read more..
Folk Song Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3278
<1min

Folk Song Pun

My Uncle Jim did not appear to be much for words. Nor, was he ever seen to have friends or pets. We thought he was the primordial loner, until one time we caught him with his ant farm.He loved the cre... read more..
Food Pun 1
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4357
<1min

Food Pun 1

The sandwich dates back to the time man discovered he could not live by bread alone.... read more..
Food Pun 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5021
<1min

Food Pun 2

Q: How can you use a lighthouse, rose trellis, windstorm, dune, and Halloween costume to create something tasty? A: Make a beacon, lattice, and tornado sand witch.... read more..
Frisbee Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
17810
<1min

Frisbee Pun

The other day I was standing in the park wondering why Frisbees get bigger and bigger the closer they get.Then it hit me.... read more..
Frog Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4584
<1min

Frog Pun

Frogs have it easy; they can eat what bugs them.... read more..
Funeral Expenses
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2499
<1min

Funeral Expenses

A woman's husband died. He had $20,000 to his name. After paying all the funeral expenses, she told her closest friend that there was no money left. The friend asked, "How can that be? You told me he ... read more..
Game Hunt
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2507
<1min

Game Hunt

They have a game hunt each year at the Kennedy compound in Massachusetts. They call it "Hyena sport."~Gary Hallock... read more..
Garden Theft
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2588
<1min

Garden Theft

"Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking." read more..
Garnish Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3998
<1min

Garnish Pun

Today's Cleanpun is actually a report to you all on a recent MSN Chat conversation I had with a CleanPun member Texas.It was a delightful chat - especially when I learned the his name was not only who... read more..
Gasr
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2991
<1min

Gasr

Saudi Arabia offered to help lower gasoline prices Sunday. It's just in time for the holiday. Americans are about to celebrate Gasover, when an angel stops by the door of every SUV and collects the fi... read more..
Gear Box Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3612
<1min

Gear Box Pun

A friend of mine tried to build a gear-box for his car using nothing but dried grass. It was never going to work; I think he was clutching at straws.... read more..
General Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2644
<1min

General Pun

I was in the band at Ellsworth Air Force Base, South Dakota.Our group was required to play for all generals who arrived on our base. One morning, when our commanding officer heard on the radio that a ... read more..
Genius Farmer
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2509
<1min

Genius Farmer

A man is driving down a country road when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing ... read more..
Gerald the Infamous Reindeer Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3303
<1min

Gerald the Infamous Reindeer Pun

My brother, a pastor, has done some methodical research and discovered the name of another one of Santa's reindeer - Gerald Lee. Gerald was bigger than the rest of the reindeer, and not too gifted in ... read more..
Ghost Marriage
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3212
<1min

Ghost Marriage

I once knew a woman wanted to marry a ghost.I don't know what possessed her!... read more..
Ghost Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3517
<1min

Ghost Pun

An intrepid photographer went to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost which was said to appear only once in a hundred years.Not wanting to frighten off the ghost, the photographer s... read more..
Gift
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4879
<1min

Gift

"My childhood was rough. Once for my birthday my old man gave me a bat. The first day I played with it, it flew away."- Rodney Dangerfield read more..
Gift Disappointment
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2543
<1min

Gift Disappointment

The rich aunt was hurt and said to her nephew, "I'm sorry you don't like your gift. I asked you if you preferred a large check or a small check.""I know, Auntie," the nephew said contritely, "but I di... read more..
Gift Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2465
<1min

Gift Pun

The fight between good and evil, an epic battle: Darth Vader and Luke. Suddenly in the middle of the fight, Darth Vader pulls Luke to him, and whispers "I know what you're getting for Christmas!"Luke ... read more..
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