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2011
Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of
3574
of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
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2026 (682)
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Search
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1769
<1min
One-liner #0232
"May thy ball lie in green pastures ... and not in still waters."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1698
<1min
One-liner #0233
"Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1718
<1min
One-liner #0234
"Money can't buy happiness - but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo"
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1659
<1min
One-liner #0235
"Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy ice cream, and that's close enough."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1729
<1min
One-liner #0236
"Most cars on our roads have only one occupant, usually the driver."- Carol Malia, BBC Anchorwoman
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1773
<1min
One-liner #0237
"Most food cannot be kept longer than the average life span of a hamster - keep a hamster in your refrigerator to gauge this."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1872
<1min
One-liner #0238
"My father invented the burglar alarm - which unfortunately was stolen from him."- Victor Borge
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1758
<1min
One-liner #0239
"My favorite party game is 'Pin the Cleanup on the Guests.'"
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1740
<1min
One-liner #0240
"My girlfriend is at that stage when her biological clock is telling her it's time for her to be making me feel guilty and immature."- Kevin Hench
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1737
<1min
One-liner #0241
"My home town was so small that the class valedictorian had both the highest & lowest averages."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1678
<1min
One-liner #0242
"My home town was so small that when it snows, salt is spread with a salad shooter."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1702
<1min
One-liner #0243
"My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying."~Ed Furgol
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1751
<1min
One-liner #0244
"My memory's not as sharp as it used to be - also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1671
<1min
One-liner #0245
"My mind works like lightning; one brilliant flash and it is gone."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1823
<1min
One-liner #0246
"My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1713
<1min
One-liner #0247
"My parents want me to have the things they didn't have when they were kids - like, all As on every report card."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1797
<1min
One-liner #0248
"My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use mine."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1698
<1min
One-liner #0249
"My wife and I have a system for settling arguments We just talk and talk until she's right."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1795
<1min
One-liner #0250
"My wife has a slight impediment in her speech - every now and then she stops to breathe."~ Jimmy Durante
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1767
<1min
One-liner #0251
"My wild oats have turned into bran flakes."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1781
<1min
One-liner #0252
"Never do anything that you'd be ashamed to tell a paramedic."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1723
<1min
One-liner #0253
"Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1706
<1min
One-liner #0254
"Never run out of altitude, air speed, & ideas at one time."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1680
<1min
One-liner #0255
"Never trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1644
<1min
One-liner #0256
"No matter how busy people are, most are never too busy to stop and talk about how busy they are."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1681
<1min
One-liner #0257
"No matter how busy people are, they are never too busy to stop and talk about how busy they are."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1725
<1min
One-liner #0258
"Nobody will ever win the Battle of the Sexes - there's just too much fraternizing with the enemy."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1667
<1min
One-liner #0259
"Nostalgia: A sentiment that combines yesterday's prices and today's incomes."
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1753
<1min
One-liner #0260
"Nutrition Facts are too depressing - how about some Nutrition Fiction?"
read more..
29 Jul
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1786
<1min
One-liner #0261
"Okay, I have a million awesome clip art images. Now what?"
read more..
Results 2131 - 2160 of 3574