Monthly Archive

July 2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 1852 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Drug Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2901
<1min

Drug Pun

Have you heard about the pharmaceutical company that developed a new drug which, when administered to women, compels them to go join a convent?The FDA refused to license it. Seems it was habit formin... read more..
E-mail Warning
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2331
<1min

E-mail Warning

If you receive an email from the Department of Health telling you not to eat canned pork because of swine flu ignore it. It's just Spam.... read more..
Edison Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4993
<1min

Edison Pun

Most people don't know that Thomas Alva Edison was among the first to show concern for western Indians. He came out to California, and finding living conditions among natives deplorable, he vowed to ... read more..
Egg Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2727
<1min

Egg Pun

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.... read more..
Egotists
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2726
<1min

Egotists

When two egotists meet, it's "an I for an I."... read more..
Eight Ball
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2713
<1min

Eight Ball

"I wonder why I always feel that I'm stuck right behind the eight ball?" Tom said racking his brain. ~Simon Champion read more..
Einstein Burger
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2542
<1min

Einstein Burger

"Have you been to that new 'Einstein Burger' yet?""Why yes I have.""How was it?""Relatively good." read more..
Electrician's Truck
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2334
<1min

Electrician's Truck

Seen on an Electrician's truck:"Let us remove your shorts."... read more..
Electronic Shows
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2514
<1min

Electronic Shows

Shows that may be appearing on TV soon, as a result of the electronic and computer age:Modem, She Wrote: Each week, our intrepid detective tries to solve the ultimate mystery: why her modem won't ever... read more..
Elephant Pun 1
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2327
<1min

Elephant Pun 1

How do you get down off of an elephant?You don't, you get down off of a duck.... read more..
Elephant Pun 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
8221
<1min

Elephant Pun 2

An elephant is drinking out of a river when he spots a turtle asleep on a log. The elephant ambles over and kicks the unsuspecting turtle clear across the river."Why did you do that?" asks a passing ... read more..
Elephant Stew Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6297
<1min

Elephant Stew Pun

Elephant Stew Recipe2 Rabbits (Optional)1 Elephant, Medium SizeSalt & Pepper to tasteBrown GravyCut elephant into small bite-sized pieces. This should take about two months. Add enough brown gravy to ... read more..
Embalming Fluid
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5122
<1min

Embalming Fluid

Undertakers Mal and Mel were storing embalming fluid.It was considered appropriate to place it in an area out of sight. Mel had his share stored promptly but there was still a good portion left for Ma... read more..
Entomologist Tenure
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3187
2 min read

Entomologist Tenure

It had been a horrible week for Henry.An entomologist (insect scientist) at the local university, he was up for a promotion this year. With the promotion would come tenure. But there was a problem. It... read more..
Equestrian Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3065
<1min

Equestrian Pun

At the Olympics in Barcelona, some of the locals were entered in equestrian events. Other contestants were surprised to note that the Spanish riders guided their horses with so much slack in the rein... read more..
Escalator
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5931
<1min

Escalator

My wife recently came home from shopping with an escalator.She'll buy anything marked down!... read more..
Eskimo Dinner 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2341
<1min

Eskimo Dinner 2

What did the eskimos sing when they got there Christmas dinner?"Whalemeat again, don't know where, don't know when!"... read more..
Eskimo Dinner
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2403
<1min

Eskimo Dinner

What did the eskimos sing when they got there Christmas dinner?"Whalemeat again, don't know where, don't know when!"... read more..
Eskimo Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
10400
<1min

Eskimo Pun

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank-proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.... read more..
Ethical Question
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3204
<1min

Ethical Question

"Would it be ethical to dig up the remains of of the USA founding fathers, create clones from the bone cells, and place them in a theme park called Clonial Williamsburg?" read more..
Everything
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2542
<1min

Everything

Q. What do you give a man who has everything?A. Antibiotics.... read more..
Excavating Burial Ground
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2928
<1min

Excavating Burial Ground

Two women archeologists are down in Mexico excavating an ancient Mayan burial ground looking for some remains to take back to their museum. Unfortunately, everything they run across is badly decompose... read more..
Family Furniture
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2441
<1min

Family Furniture

Working on a new trick, a magician turned his wife into a couch and his kids into chairs, but he couldn't turn them back.What have I done? he wondered. How can I bring back my family?Out of ideas, he ... read more..
Fan Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4792
<1min

Fan Pun

While I was in the Air Force in Vietnam, I was in charge of a parts supply depot where the only relief from the heat was provided by an electric fan in my office.One morning I accidentally caught my f... read more..
Farmer Loses 2025 Pigs
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2882
<1min

Farmer Loses 2025 Pigs

Howard County police officers still write their reports by hand. The data is entered later into their database by a clerk.One theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be... read more..
Fate Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
7424
<1min

Fate Pun

"Oh, master...tell me of fate.""Ah, my son...it is what has brought great nations together. It has made the world a smaller place in which to live. It has inspired men of worth to work endless hours. read more..
Feeding
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2779
<1min

Feeding

"Mom," said the little girl, "Is it alright to say you are going to water the horse when you are giving him a drink of water?""Yes," said her mother, "that is the correct thing to say.""Well then, I'm read more..
Fight
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2631
<1min

Fight

A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.... read more..
Fine Furniture
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3264
<1min

Fine Furniture

As the woman was instructing the new maid on the great care required in handling certain valuable household objects. She pointed to the dining room and said with great satisfaction, "That table goes b... read more..
Firefly
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4448
<1min

Firefly

A mother firefly and her brood were out for a walk. 'Whatever happens,' mom ordered, 'don't shine your light. I don't want you eaten by owls.'Sure enough, after a little while, she spotted the younges... read more..
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