Monthly Archive

July 2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 1778 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Chicken Pun 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2476
<1min

Chicken Pun 2

Q. Why does a chicken coop have two doors? A. Because if it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.... read more..
Chicken Surprise
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2543
<1min

Chicken Surprise

A couple goes for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and orders the "Chicken Surprise." The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast-iron pot.Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of ... read more..
Chickens in Trees
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3035
<1min

Chickens in Trees

During the Revolutionary War, there was a small encampment of patriot soldiers the woods. Before they went to bed that night, they tied chickens (they were saving them for a special meal when needed) ... read more..
Children and Cement
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3375
2 min read

Children and Cement

A very strange thing happened here in suburbia a few days ago. This past weekend, I noticed a neighbor of mine repairing his sidewalk. He had removed a number of broken sections (thanks to numerous tr... read more..
Clinic Change
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2331
<1min

Clinic Change

The Mayo Clinic, getting on board with today's diet and health conscious society, just changed its name.It's now the Balsamic Vinaigrette Clinic.... read more..
Clown Bite
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2624
<1min

Clown Bite

Trouser was normally a happy-go-lucky dog. He would chase tennis balls, play with other doggies, and eat his dinner without a fuss. He was a dog without a care.But on that fateful autumn afternoon, it... read more..
Coffin Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
5839
<1min

Coffin Pun

A man was walking home alone late one night when he hears a BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... behind him.Walking faster he looks back, and makes out the image of an upright coffin banging its way down the middl... read more..
Collie
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3630
<1min

Collie

One of the pups in a breeder's litter of collies had a strange appetite, fostered no doubt, because the dog fancier's kennel was deep in the southern United States.The odd youngster spurned regular do... read more..
Columbus Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4670
<1min

Columbus Pun

We all know that Columbus believed the world was round when others believed it was flat and that if you traveled far enough you would go over the edge.We also know that Columbus reached what we now kn... read more..
Compiled Baby Name Puns
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2800
<1min

Compiled Baby Name Puns

At the end of April I began sending out a bunch of baby name puns. Many of you have asked for a complete list of all that were sent out. Here you go. Thanks to those who added their own suggestions. I... read more..
Computer
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2394
<1min

Computer

The best computer is a man, and it's the only one that can be mass-produced by unskilled labor.... read more..
Constitution 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
10503
<1min

Constitution 2

The Founding Fathers were sitting around a table sometime in 1788, working on the constitution. It had been a long day when Thomas Jefferson said, "Whew! It's getting rather warm in here, isn't it?"Be... read more..
Cooking for Tom
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2134
2 min read

Cooking for Tom

It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls. Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The reci... read more..
Cooking Shows
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1986
<1min

Cooking Shows

"On cooking shows, there is little margerine of error." read more..
Costume Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2073
<1min

Costume Pun

This guy goes to a Halloween party with a girl on his back."What on earth are you?" asks the host. "I'm a snail," says the guy. "But... you have a girl on your back," replies the host. "Yeah, he says,... read more..
Cow Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2279
<1min

Cow Pun

What do you get from a pampered cow?Spoiled milk.... read more..
Criminal Attorney
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2222
<1min

Criminal Attorney

Walking into the local chamber of commerce, the stranger obviously looked desperate. He approached the guy at the counter and asked, "Is there a criminal attorney in town?"The guy behind the counter r... read more..
Damsel Dress
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2864
<1min

Damsel Dress

Once upon a time an evil king captured a beautiful princess and held her hostage in his high tower. Though she was very beautiful he forced her to wear a disgusting and smelly burlap dress."You'll nev... read more..
Date Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2333
<1min

Date Pun

Every calendar's days are numbered.... read more..
Dating
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6391
<1min

Dating

Two elderly gentlemen were visiting. "I guess you're never too old," the first one boasted. "Why just yesterday a pretty college girl said she'd be interested in dating me but to be perfectly honest,... read more..
Daylight Driving
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2392
<1min

Daylight Driving

Ever wonder why some people won't drive during daylight hours in a certain part of California?It's 'cause their doctors told them to stay out of the sun to avoid car Sonoma.... read more..
Definitions of a Bachelor
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2567
<1min

Definitions of a Bachelor

* One who avoids Bride-Eyed women.* One who believes in Life, Liberty and the Happiness of Pursuit.* One who can go fishing anytime, until he gets hooked.* One who can't be Spouse-Broken.* One who kno read more..
Delivery Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6003
<1min

Delivery Pun

My husband and I were returning home from our childbirth class at Manhattan's Beekman Hospital. Noting my obvious pregnancy, the taxi driver, a Mr. Ho, proceeded to tell us about his wife's experienc... read more..
Demolition Derby Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4237
<1min

Demolition Derby Pun

The best way to watch a demolition derby?Through a kaleidoscope.... read more..
Dentist Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2285
<1min

Dentist Pun

The judge asked his dentist:"Will you drill the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?"... read more..
Dentures
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4912
<1min

Dentures

I went to the dentist with my uncle the other day. He needed needed new dentures. The dentist showed him some that only cost a dollar. The dentist did want my uncle to understand, though, that they we... read more..
Depunable
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2523
<1min

Depunable

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, and dry cleaners depressed?Laundry workers ... read more..
Detective Pun
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
13935
<1min

Detective Pun

A detective who spent his entire career in plain clothes quit the police force and bought a farm."What kind of crops do you plan to grow?" the police chief asked the farmer-to-be."Carrots and potatoes... read more..
Diagnosis Pun 1
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2745
<1min

Diagnosis Pun 1

A psychiatrist is doing rounds in his hospital with a couple of students.They look in on one patient and the psychiatrist says to his students, "Sometimes this fellow thinks he's a temptress in a Bize... read more..
Diagnosis Pun 2
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2972
<1min

Diagnosis Pun 2

A man walks into the psychiatrist's office and says, "Doc, you gotta help me, I keep having this recurring feeling that I'm going to shrink! What can I do?"The doctor replied, "Now, calm down, you jus... read more..
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