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More Jokes

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    Accounting Secret

    There was once an accounting firm where the senior CPA knew everything there was to know…
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    Taxi Craze

    Jill had to grab a cab to get to a meeting uptown. She hailed one down, got in, and told…
  • river

    Goober at the River

    You can find a picture of a goober at…
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    Mint Mom

    When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become…
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    One-liners

    1. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.2. Make yourself at home! Clean my…
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    Computer T-Shirt Slogans - #1

    Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.As a computer, I find your faith in technology…
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    Peter's Portrait

    One semester when my brother, Peter, attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis,…
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    Dayvorce

    A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce.The attorney…
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    Sewing Lesson

    My granddaughter came to spend a few weeks with me, and I decided to teach her to…
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    Sam's Fishing

    A game warden noticed how a particular fellow named Sam consistently caught more fish…
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    Biblical Spokespersons

    What if Biblical characters could be recruited as high-tech promoters? Consider the…
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    More Dog Quotes

    "If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise" -Unknown "In dog years, I'm…
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    Too Late To Date

    An elderly woman died last month.Having never married, she requested no male…
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    Votive Candles

    Visiting St Patrick's Cathedral on a tour of New York City, my daughter and her children…
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    Dogs

    ** If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket then…
Computer One-liners - Part 1

Hard Disk space: the final frontier!

Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.

hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY?

H lp! S m b d st l ll th v w ls fr m m k yb rd!

COMMAND: A suggestion made to a computer.

Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS

ASCII a stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

Hold a hard drive to your ear -- listen to the C:

I am a computer, dumber than any human and smarter than an administrator.

I am logged in, therefore I am.

I are Pentium of Borg. Division is futile. You will be approximated.

I came, I saw, I deleted all your files.

I had a life once... now I have a computer and a modem.

I know I'm supposed to back up my files, but I still haven't found reverse on my PC.

I was going to switch her to DOS, but she had a gun

I'll give up my Windows 3.1 when they pry my cold, dead fingers off the mouse.

If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0

In my next life I'm going to have more memory installed

Intel - still number 0.999873464508.
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