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  • airplane1

    Captain Discipline

    About 90 fifth-graders piled into the airliner I was flying, on their way home from a…
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    Lost Pigs

    Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered…
  • airport security

    Packing

    I was scheduled to fly from North Carolina to Germany, where my husband was stationed in…
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    Speeding Juggler

    A driver was pulled over for speeding by a police officer. As the officer was writing the…
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    Daaaad!

    A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later:"Da-ad...""What?""I'm…
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    Name Warning

    On a street, where the speed is limited to 30 mph the police stop a driver."Not only have…
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    Removing The Dents

    A goober left his car out in a hail storm. When the storm was over he checked the car and…
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    Dear Dog

    Dear Dog,I am so sorry about you being sent to the dog pound for the broken lamp which…
  • smiling girl

    More On Candidates

    A newscaster interrupted scheduled programming to announce the outcome of a political…
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    Awake Tip

    Tech support people like me spend our days on the phone with customers. Many like to chat…
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    Memory School

    Two elderly gentlemen are playing cards on Saturday evening as they have done for the…
  • bear

    I Want To Be A Bear

    I want to be a bear...... If you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but…
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    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow1. Text on Web pages displays…
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    Gore Flubs

    We've all flubbed things we were trying to say - here are some flubs attributed to Al…
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    Let Us Know

    The following advertisement appeared in a physical culture magazine:"Here's a good test…

Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed.  There is nothing to worry about.  Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left."

Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours.  But don't worry .  .  .  we can fly just fine on two engines."

An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours.  But don't worry...  we still have one engine left."

A goober turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"

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