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    Getting Fat

    When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room…
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    Moving Label

    Having moved 15 times during our 37-year marriage, my husband and I appreciate movers who…
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    In the Bag

    I had an offer from a large company and they offered to fly me out to the meeting on…
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    Searching For Witnesses

    The policeman arrived at the scene of an accident to find that a car had struck a…
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    Freezer Order

    I have my own system for labeling homemade freezer meals. Forget calling them "Veal…
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    Letter From Home

    I had an extended tour of duty in Okinawa in 1958 and was unable to bring my wife and…
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    Sharon's Shampoo

    Hi, pastor Tim! This is a story of something I did to myself not too long ago. I live in…
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    Boat Rental

    A Scotsman, planning a trip to the Holy Land, was aghast when he found it would cost…
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    Auction Parrot

    One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this…
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    Life After Death

    "Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees. "Yes, Sir."…
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    Worst Decision Yet

    A king was quite concerned about a decision he had just made, so much so that he went to…
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    Dad and Baby

    One day shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to do some…
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    Concert Lights

    My 14-year-old daughter, Maggie, and her best friend, Joannie are fans of 60's music.…
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    Seconds First

    A young woman wasn't feeling well and asked one her co-workers to recommend a physician.…
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    Freshman's Blind Date

    "How was your blind date?" a freshman college student asked her roommate. "Terrible!" the…

An goober goes for a job interview in an office.  The interviewer starts with the basics.  "So, Miss, can you tell us your age, please?"

The goober counts carefully on her fingers for half a minute before replying.......  "Ehhhh...  22."

The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice.  "And can you tell us your height, please?"

The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag.  She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head.  She checks the measurement and announces ....."Five foot two!"

This isn't looking good so the interviewer goes for the real basics; something the interviewee won't have to count, measure, or lookup.  "Just to confirm for our records, your name please?"

The goober bobs her head from side to side for about fifteen seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying ......."Mandy!"

The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks "What were you doing when I asked you your name?"

"Ohhhh, that!" replies the goober, " I was just running through that song,......  'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you....' ".

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