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  • cooking

    Cooking Terms

    Tongue: a variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a…
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    Battle Of The Dogs

    The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized that if they continued…
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    Top 10 Signs Your Vet Bill Is Going To Require Financing

    -- The doc's thermometer registers in Fahrenheit, Celsius and dollars. -- The bill came…
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    Actual Church Bulletin Bloopers

    (From the Archives back in 1999)1) Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other…
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    Wedding Blessing

    At a wedding ceremony that I was performing, I raised my hand to give the final…
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    The Magician and The Parrot

    A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different…
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    Winter House

    We purchased an old home in Northern New York State from two elderly sisters. Winter was…
  • picture of a judge's gavel

    I'll Testify To That

    Several women, each trying to one-up the other, appeared in court, each accusing the…
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    Goober on the Loose

    Three convicts escaped from prison. They made it to the downtown of a nearby city but…
  • computer keyboard

    Military Computer Manners

    The Pentagon recently unveiled its new super computer to the top brass. This fantastic…
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    In Need of Prayer

    A young boy called the pastor of a local "corner" church to ask the pastor to come by to…
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    Forced Landing

    A flight instructor was sent out to help a student who had radioed that he was about to…
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    Hashing It Out

    I was working as a short-order cook at two restaurants in the same neighborhood. On a…
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    Locked Out

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Good Guess

    A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic. "Here is the situation,"…

I play pinochle regularly with seven other women, most of whom are 70 or older. Recently we celebrated the birthday of our oldest member by taking her out to lunch. When the waitress came to take our order, one of the women said to her, "This is a very special occasion. It's Elsie's ninety-second birthday."

The waitress made seven instant enemies and one fast friend by asking the question, "Which one is Elsie?"

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