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    Top 10 Dog Pet Peeves About Humans

    1. Blaming your gas on me.... Not Funny 2. Yelling at me for barking. I am a dog you…
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    Prepared Chicken

    "May I take your order?" the waiter asked. "Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"…
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    Funeral Music

    At our local crematorium families are given the chance to chose the music CD they would…
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    Morning Sickness

    Sarah dropped in on her sister Molly and found her sitting at the kitchen table, staring…
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    Executive Approval

    For many years I worked as a receptionist and switchboard operator at a busy company.…
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    Vet Cure

    A Veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the…
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    Message Break

    A pastor, known for his lengthy sermons, noticed a man get up and leave during the middle…
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    Pastoral Visit

    After the birth of their child, an Episcopal priest, wearing his clerical collar, visited…
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    Strangest Recording

    I got the strangest recording when I called the phone company the other day.It said, "You…
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    Look Like Mom

    A two-and-a-half-year-old walked into the bathroom while her mother was putting on…
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    Ten Minute Wait

    I called to make airline reservations and was put on hold. After several minutes of taped…
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    One and Ten

    Elizabeth was surprised to receive ten dollars from her Aunt for her birthday. The Aunt…
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    Computer Error

    I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Harold, the computer guy, to come…
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    10 Minutes Alone

    After a day of grueling maneuvers under the blazing Texas sun, the platoon stood in front…

Ever notice that the laws of household physics are every bit as real as all other laws of the universe?  Here are a few examples:

1.  A child's eagerness to assist in any project varies in inverse proportion to his ability to actually do the work involved.

2.  Leftovers always expand to fill all available containers plus one.

3.  A newly washed window gathers dirt at double the speed of an unwashed window.

4.  The availability of a ballpoint pen is inversely proportional to how badly it is needed.

5.  The same clutter that will fill a one-car garage will fill a two-car garage.

6.  Three children plus two cookies equals a fight.

7.  The potential for disaster is in direct proportion to the number of TV remote controls divided by the number of viewers.

8.  The number of doors left open varies inversely with the outdoor temperature.

9.  The capacity of any hot-water heater is equal to one and one-half sibling showers.

10.  What goes up must come down, except bubble gum and slightly used Rice Krispies.

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