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More Jokes

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    Cake Disaster

    Many years ago my just married young cousin moved into an upstairs apartment and invited…
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    Weird Library Reference Questions

    All of these situations are real and some of them were mighty embarrassing.Enjoy! Part 1:…
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    Scale Pondering

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    Cops and Robbers

    Esther Cohen had three very active boys. One summer evening she was playing cops and…
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    Turtle Ears

    Tradition here in the office is to keep a notepad with the punch lines from the various…
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    Stolen Wallet

    It was John's turn to drive carpool into town on a day when a new member was travelling…
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    Rewiring

    Because our former small-town parish was not a wealthy one, our pastor was dependent on…
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    Ships Passing

    A rather old minesweeper was cruising a lonely stretch of the South Pacific and was…
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    Goober Ring

    Passing an office building late one night, a Goober saw a sign that said, "Press bell for…
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    Athletics Anonymous

    These days, with all the emphasis on one's physical fitness, a new organization has…
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    Muddy General

    During training exercises, the lieutenant driving down a muddy back road encountered…
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    Stuffed Pockets

    A small boy stunned his parents after church one Sunday when he began to empty his…
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    Things It Takes Most Of Us 50 Years To Learn

    1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.2.…
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    Doctor Visit

    A guy walks into a Doctor's office. He has a sausage coming out of his ear, a waffle out…
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    Morning March

    I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding…

When a grandmother was in her late eighties, she decided to move to Israel. As part of the preparations, she went to see her doctor and get all her charts. The doctor asked her how she was doing, so she gave him the litany of complaints - this hurts, that's stiff, I'm tired and slower, etc.

He responded with, "Mrs. Siegel, you have to expect things to start deteriorating. After all, who wants to live to 100?"

The grandmother looked him straight in the eye and replied, "Anyone who's 99."

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