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    Heard By Tech

    Things heard by tech support:Customer: "I have Microword Soft."Customer: "Microwave…
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    In-Flight Humor

    Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture,"…
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    Top Ten Y2K Survivalists To Do Lis

    10. Apologize to neighbors about the tripwire incident...offer to replace dog. 9. Take up…
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    Tree Faller

    While working as a radiology technician in a hospital emergency room, I took X-rays of a…
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    Will She Say Yes?

    An extremely wealthy 65-year-old man falls in love with a young woman in her twenties and…
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    Don't Repeat

    My husband, Michael, and I were at a restaurant with his boss, a rather stern older man.…
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    Bananas

    As part of the admission procedure in the hospital where I work, I ask the patients if…
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    Mechanic Rate

    A woman surgeon was disturbed about the high cost of her car repair. "This is…
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    CD Entrance

    At our local crematorium families are given the chance to chose the music CD they would…
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    The Flu Do-Si-Do

    Flu season will be here soon. Here's a square dance you can call when it does.The Flu…
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    As It Lies

    Bill and Bob, longtime golfing buddies, were involved in a match-play contest with the…
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    The English Language

    Lets face itEnglish is a stupid language.There is no egg in the eggplantNo ham in the…
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    Wedding Vows

    A grandmother overheard her 5-year-old granddaughter playing "wedding." The wedding vows…
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    Forgetfulness

    While on a car trip, an old couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. The old…
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    Shoe Follow

    Two elderly women were trying on shoes in our store. When I slipped a shoe onto one…

Pete and Gladys were looking at a new living room suite in the furniture store.

Pete said to the salesman, "We really like it, but I don't think we can afford it."

The salesman said, "You just make a small down payment, and then you don't make another payment for six months."

Gladys wheeled around with her hands on her hips and said, "Who told you about us?"

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