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More Jokes

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    Not Likely

    In my sociology class, we were instructed to write down answers to some questions the…
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    Murphy's Laws on Computers

    *Murphy's Laws on Computers*- As soon as you delete a worthless file, you'll need it.-…
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    A Texas Blessing

    *A Texas Blessing*Bless this house, oh Lord, we cryPlease keep it cool in mid-July. Bless…
  • airplane1

    Captain Discipline

    About 90 fifth-graders piled into the airliner I was flying, on their way home from a…
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    Amazing Golf Ball

    A golfer, playing a round by himself, is about to tee off, and a salesman runs up to him,…
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    Speeding Juggler

    A driver was pulled over by a police officer for speeding. As the officer was writing the…
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    Cancelling Cards

    Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so priceless, and so easy to…
  • old lady

    Cast Off

    An elderly lady, who lived on the third floor of a boardinghouse, broke her leg. As the…
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    The 3 stages of man

    The 3 stages of man:He believes in Santa Claus.He doesn't believe in Santa Claus.He is…
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    Expecting

    "How does Jamie like being pregnant?" Danny asked his friend Ryan."Oh, she's not…
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    Death Statistic

    A lady on a commuter train was reading a newspaper article about life and death…
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    Lost Ball

    My job as a land surveyor took me to a golf course that was expanding from 9 holes to 18…
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    Referrals

    When our local doctor began attending church services the minister was delighted, and it…
  • plane war

    Commando Moses

    Nine year old Joey, was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday school. "Well,…
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    Bakery Robbery

    My cousin was behind the bakery's cash register one morning when a gunman burst in and…

1.  I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.

2.  I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.

3.  I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.

4.  I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount of bodily injury I could expect to receive from missing them.

5.  I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.

6.  I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the amount of time given.

7.  If at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.

8.  I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.

9.  I shall always begin, start, initiate, take the first step, and/or write the first word, when I get around to it.

10.  I will never put off tomorrow, what I can forget about forever.

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