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More Jokes

  • Army march joke

    Morning March

    I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding…
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    Campaign Funding

    Can you believe a candidate dropped out of the race because of a lack of campaign funds?…
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    Halloween Pun

    Bob Hill and his new wife, Betty, were vacationing in Europe -- as it happens, in…
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    3 eggs - 50 years

    A newly ordained preacher and his young wife were talking about being more considerate of…
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    New Boater

    This past summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of…
  • man shopping

    Can't Take It With You

    "You just go ahead," the man in the shopping mall said to his wife. "While you're…
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    Slow-Driving Grandma

    Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police…
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    Mechanic Rate

    A woman surgeon was disturbed about the high cost of her car repair. "This is…
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    Fishing Advice

    Two buddies are fishing, but they haven't caught anything all day. Then, another…
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    Golf Survey

    My job as a land surveyor took me to a golf course that was expanding from 9 holes to 18…
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    Charity Better than Expected

    Members of the Methodist women's church circle in one Wisconsin town some years ago were…
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    Coast Guard Lingo

    When my husband joined the Coast Guard, I knew there would be some adjustments. Not only…
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    Time Off

    Two factory workers were talking. "I know how to get some time off from work." said the…
  • picture of a thanksgiving turkey

    Turkey Size

    A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one…
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    Haircut Request

    When a customer slid into the barber chair, the barber asked him how he wanted his hair…

SIGNS YOU ARE BROKE

1. American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!"
2. Your idea of a 7-course meal is taking a deep breath outside a restaurant.
3. You're formulating a plan to rob the food bank.
4. Long distance companies don't call you to switch.
5. You look at your roommate and see a large fried chicken in tennis shoes.
6. Your rob Peter...and then rob Paul.
7. You finally clean your house, hoping to find change.
8. You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.
9. Your bologna has no first name.
10. You give blood everyday...just for the orange juice.
11. Sally Struthers sends you food.
12. McDonalds supplies you with all your kitchen condiments.

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