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    How To Speak English Properly

    *How to speak English Properly* Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects. Prepositions are…
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    Thanksgiving Blessing

    May your stuffing be tasty, May your holiday turkey be plump, May your potatoes ‘n gravy…
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    Family Problems

    Two men met at a bus stop and struck up a conversation. One of them kept complaining of…
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    Shovel Need

    One morning a local highway department crew reaches their job-site and realizes they have…
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    Clean Cup

    Bill and Doug went into a diner that looked as though it had seen better days. As they…
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    Ticket Excuse

    Philadelphia's Highway Patrol officers hear all kinds of creative excuses that drivers…
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    Bat Delivery

    As the manager of our hospital's softball team, I was responsible for returning equipment…
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    Reading At Lunchtime

    A Jewish man took his Passover lunch to eat outside in the park. He sat down on a bench…
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    Well Done

    John was furious when his steak arrived too rare."Waiter," he shouted, "Didn't you hear…
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    Little Benjamin

    Little Benjamin came running into the kitchen where is mother was working. "Mom, can I…
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    Audi Alteram Parten

    During a Law course class, the 'Audi Alteram Parten' rule was explained. Translated it…
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    Paid For Standing

    The owner of a manufacturing firm decided to make a surprise tour of the factory. Walking…
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    Shoplifter Excuse

    My friend, the manager of a grocery store, nabbed a shoplifter in the act. He was…
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    Goober Horseback Riding

    A goober decides to try horseback riding, even though he has had no lessons or prior…
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    Signs That You May Be Canadian

    1. You stand in "line-ups" at the movie, not lines. 2. You understand the phrase, "Could…
*The Ten Most Common Forms of Office Illness*

1.  The Macy's One Day Sale Flu.

2.  The Drivers License Renewal Appointment 24-Hour Virus.

3.  The Friday-Afternoon-Start-The-Weekend-Early Sudden Unbearable Stomach Pains.

4.  The I'm Looking for a New Job and I Don't Know How Long It's Going to Take, but I Want To Stay On The Payroll Until Then Mysterious Infection.

5.  The My Boyfriend's Got the Week Off So Suddenly I'm Too Contagious To Come In To The Office Disease.

6.  The I Need a Hair Cut and My Stylist Doesn't Make Evening Appointments Bout of Influenza.

7.  The There's No Federal Holidays for Two Months and I Want a Day Off Sickness.

8.  The It's Spring Break and I Want To Pretend I'm a Teenager Again General Ailment.

9.  The I've Messed Up Royally and I Won't Come In To Face the Music Terminal Illness.

10.  The I Really Am Sick and I've Got The Doctor's Bills and the Completed Medical Expense Reimbursement Forms to Prove It Infirmity.
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