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More Jokes

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    Worthy Cause

    As a traffic safety consultant, I often gave talks on accident prevention. One night…
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    Mummy Heart Failure

    An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket…
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    Preacher's Donkey

    A man bought a donkey from a preacher. The preacher told the man that this donkey had…
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    High School Record

    Back at my high school for the tenth reunion, I met my old coach, Mr. Carlier. Walking…
  • bill couple

    After Me

    "I have to have a raise," the man said to his boss. "Three companies are after me." "Is…
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    Nervous Young Minister

    A nervous young minister, new to the church, told the flock, "For my text today, I will…
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    Fish Fight Story

    Doug was describing a 30-pound bass he'd caught recently, after fighting it for three…
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    Pastor's Golf Sunday

    There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he could be…
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    Ungrateful Son-In-Law

    A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. "I love my daughter,…
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    Family Problems

    Two men met at a bus stop and struck up a conversation. One of them kept complaining of…
  • auto mechanic1

    On The Ball Mechanic

    My dad, an auto mechanic, received a repair order that read: "Check for clunking sound…
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    Civil War Re-enactment

    Thinking his son would enjoy seeing the re-enactment of a Civil War battle, my niece's…
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    Unbreakable

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Tow Request

    The minister's car wouldn't start and so he called the garage to come and tow it in for…
  • A Picture of a stack of books

    Back To School

    After raising 4 kids, and losing one husband, I decided to return to college and get the…

 

-- The doc's thermometer registers in Fahrenheit, Celsius and dollars.

-- The bill came with payment coupons.

-- Your Doberman just ate the receptionist.

-- "He has a very rare blood type. It's called '$$ Positive.'"

-- He starts talking about extended quality of life, miracles of modern veterinary medicine and joint replacement procedures. You own a goldfish.

-- They take away the blood sample on a sterling silver serving tray.

-- The sad, pathetic whining in the exam room is coming from the owners.

-- You suddenly realize where you've heard that low whistle before: from the plumber and the auto mechanic.

-- "Do you have any idea how expensive hamster defibrillators are?"

-- and the #1 Sign Your Veterinary Bill is Going to Require Financing:

"We can rebuild him. Make him stronger, faster...."

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