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    Understanding the Signs

    Over the years, my husband and I have usually managed to decode the cute but confusing…
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    Overdrawn

    While waiting in line at the bank, a co-worker developed a very loud case of hiccups. By…
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    The Power of Government

    Pythagorean theorem : 24 WordsThe Lord's Prayer : 66 WordsArchimedes' Principle : 67…
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    Vendor Problem

    In a software design meeting, we were using typical technical jargon to discuss a data…
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    Last Words Heard

    3 friends die in a car accident and they go to an orientation in heaven. They are all…
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    Inferior Bags

    It was very crowded at the supermarket, and the customer in front of me had a large…
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    Actual Church Bulletin Bloopers

    (From the Archives back in 1999)1) Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other…
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    Liberal Headlines

    If Biblical Headlines were written by Today's Liberal…
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    Thoughts on Genealogy

    ~ Genealogy: Tracing yourself back to better people.~ I trace my family history so I will…
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    The End is Near

    A local priest and pastor stood by the side of the road holding up a sign that said, "The…
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    Football Signals

    A three-year-old in the congregation regularly watched football games with his father. So…
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    Texas Cruise

    A Texas rancher, visiting a South Dakota farmer friend, asked him to show him his…
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    Family Togetherness

    An older woman recently returned from her hometown in North Carolina and told a friend…
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    Old Friends

    Amy and Judy are old friends. They have both been married to their husbands for a long…
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    A Deeper Problem

    Little Johnny had been bringing his drawings home from kindergarten every day since he…

 

-- The doc's thermometer registers in Fahrenheit, Celsius and dollars.

-- The bill came with payment coupons.

-- Your Doberman just ate the receptionist.

-- "He has a very rare blood type. It's called '$$ Positive.'"

-- He starts talking about extended quality of life, miracles of modern veterinary medicine and joint replacement procedures. You own a goldfish.

-- They take away the blood sample on a sterling silver serving tray.

-- The sad, pathetic whining in the exam room is coming from the owners.

-- You suddenly realize where you've heard that low whistle before: from the plumber and the auto mechanic.

-- "Do you have any idea how expensive hamster defibrillators are?"

-- and the #1 Sign Your Veterinary Bill is Going to Require Financing:

"We can rebuild him. Make him stronger, faster...."

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