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    Planting Time

    A prisoner in jail received a letter from his wife: "I have decided to plant some…
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    Important Political Decisions

    As a recent high-school graduate, I traveled to our state capitol and got to visit the…
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    Goober Loot

    Two Goobers, Bob and Joe, decided to rob a bank and all they get away with are two sacks,…
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    Bar Room Houdini

    A deputy police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance"…
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    Famous Last Words

    *Famous Last Words* *Ha! They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist... *Don't unplug it,…
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    Famous Last Words

    * Don't turn it on yet, it's not quite ready.* Step back a bit, I can't get you in the…
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    Dollar Measure

    Our mom needed a new mattress for her antique bed, so my brother, Josh, and I decided to…
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    Signs the Childhood is Over

    Just one peanut butter and jelly sandwich doesn't do it anymore. Driving a car doesn't…
  • studying ahead

    Ode To Finals Week

    Twas the night before finals, and all through the college,The students were praying for…
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    Trio of Puns

    Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous…
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    For Sale Sign

    A real-estate agent was driving around with a new trainee when she spotted a charming…
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    Lab Mix

    This was a story told to us by our chemistry master at school. A student wished to make…
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    Actual Hiker Comments

    These are actual comments left last year on Forest Service registration sheets and…
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    Moving Smith

    Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office."Boss," he says, "we're doing some…
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    Hawaii or Havaii

    These two persons are discussing whether the state of Hawaii is pronounced 'Havaii,' or…

(17) There is no "I" in "teamwork"...But there is in "management kiss-up".

(16) If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.

(15) The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.

(14) Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done.  Doing the job WRONG 14 times gives you job security.

(13) If you think we're a bad company, you should see the competition.

(12) Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings...they did it by killing all those who oppose them.

(11) We put the "k" in "kwality".

(10) 2 days without a human rights violation.

(9) Your job is STILL better than asking "You want fries with that?".

(8) We build great products when we feel like it and don't have any reason to call in sick.

(7) If at first you don't succeed, try management.

(6) Teamwork means never having to take all the blame yourself.

(5) The beatings will continue until morale improves.

(4) Pride, Commitment, Teamwork.  Words we use to get you to work for free.

(3) If at first you don't succeed, delegate it.

(2) Plagiarism saves time...

And The #1 Inspirational Message Never Heard At Work:

(1) Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

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