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More Jokes

  • fire station

    Fire Test

    Joey and his classmates had just finished a tour of the local fire hall. Before each…
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    Shopping Bags

    It was very crowded at the supermarket, and the customer in front of me had a large…
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    Positively Wrong

    A linguistics professor was lecturing his class."In English," he explained, "a double…
  • circus

    Circus Try Out

    A man decides to join the circus. He shows up to demonstrate his skills to Morris, the…
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    First Sermon

    At his first service, the new preachers sermon was extremely long and dull. As he…
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    Amateur Paleontologist

    Paleoanthropology Division Smithsonian Institute 207 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington, DC…
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    Goober On The Net

    A goober went to his mail box several times before it was even time for the mailman to…
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    Prison Riot

    The warden, addressing the three instigators of a failed prison riot, said, "I would like…
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    Ode to a Shedding Cat

    I think that I shall never seeA cat that sheds as much as thee. Thy fur that sticks is…
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    Hearing Loss

    A man goes to his doctor and says, "I don't think my wife's hearing is as good as it used…
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    Senior's Ode to Medication

    A row of bottles on my shelfcaused me to analyze myself.One yellow pill I have to popGoes…
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    Politically Correct Statements for a New Century

    Your bedroom isn't cluttered, it's just "passage restrictive." Kids don't get grounded…
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    Cat Musings**********

    I think this is pretty much how cats think in their heads - you can tell by the way that…
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    Babysitting

    With some misgivings, we left a young babysitter in charge of our three energetic…
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    Not For Lunch

    My husband retired, and for the first time in over 40 years I had to think about…

You're NOT having a bad day ...  these people had bad days:

1.  The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.  At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from the onlookers.  A minute later they were both eaten by a killer whale.

2.  A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards an electric kettle.
Intending to jolt him away from the deadly electrical current, she whacked him with a plank of wood that had been by the back door, breaking his arm in two places.  Till that moment he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

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