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  • self defense

    Self Defense

    During a practical exercise at a military police base, the instructor was giving the…
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    Cross Country Move

    When we moved cross-country, my wife and I decided to drive both of our cars. Nathan, our…
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    Top Nine Stupid Questions Received by the Chap Stick Hotline

    Top Nine Stupid Questions Received by the Chap Stick Hotline9. "Hi, is this the chopstick…
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    Ball Markers

    A Golfer walks into the pro shop at the local course and asks the golf pro if they sell…
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    Grocery Pickup

    Soon after my 16-year-old sister started working after school as a grocery-store cashier,…
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    Cat Prayer

    Cat PrayerNow I lay me down to sleep,I pray this cushy life to keep.I pray for toys that…
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    SPCA Rescue

    "Hello, hello?" shrilled a spinsterish voice over the phone. "Is this the SPCA?""Yes.""I…
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    Caught on the Job

    The new army recruit was given guard duty at 2 A.M. He did his best for a while, but at…
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    Ten Minute Wait

    I called to make airline reservations and was put on hold. After several minutes of taped…
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    Isn't That Nice?

    Two delicate flowers of Southern womanhood (one of whom was from Texas) were conversing…
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    Speeding Stories

    *PULLED OVER* "Hey you! Pull over!" shouted the traffic cop. The lady complied, and the…
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    The Congregation Replied

    Down in the south, there are many churches known as "answer back" churches. When the…
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    Insufficient Brain Activity

    A South American scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that…
  • businessman blamed for long speech

    20 Minutes of Eternity

    The CEO was scheduled to speak at an important convention so he asked one of his…
  • guard dog

    Guard Dog

    My sister-in-law, a truck driver, decided to get a dog for protection. As she inspected a…

You're NOT having a bad day ...  these people had bad days:

1.  The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.  At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from the onlookers.  A minute later they were both eaten by a killer whale.

2.  A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards an electric kettle.
Intending to jolt him away from the deadly electrical current, she whacked him with a plank of wood that had been by the back door, breaking his arm in two places.  Till that moment he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

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