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    Calling In Sick

    Early one morning, my husband, who works in a funeral home, woke me, complaining of…
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    Get Your Own

    One day a group of scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and…
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    Parts Search

    I was living in the mountains above Denver when my college buddy, Gary, arrived in his…
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    Rain or Shine

    It was raining quite hard as U.S. Marine trainees assembled outdoors for a briefing. On a…
  • abc blocks

    The ABC Song

    Customer: “Hey, can you help me find this book?” Me: “Sure.” (He holds up a piece of…
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    Dad and Surgeon

    This older man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son,…
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    Full Pockets

    A small boy stunned his parents when he began to empty his pockets of nickels, dimes and…
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    Approval Letter

    After trying a new shampoo for the first time, Dewey mailed off an enthusiastic letter of…
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    School Notes

    The following notes from parents excusing their children from attending school have been…
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    Hair Mission

    In dire need of a beauty make-over, I went to my salon with a fashion magazine photo of a…
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    Mind Games For Dogs

    From the dog manual on how to mess with the minds of your humans. 1. After your humans…
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    Buffalo Comments

    Two buffalo were standing on the range when a passing tourist said, "Those are the…
  • picture of pierced ears

    Pierced Ears

    The students in my third-grade class were bombarding me with questions about my newly…
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    Mr. Jones Is History

    Mr. Jones, the elementary school principal, made it a practice to visit the classes from…
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    Efficiency

    An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You don't want to try…
A young businessman had just started his own firm.  He had just rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques.

Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office.  Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working.

He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.  Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?"

"Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines."
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