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    Say Something Positive

    A husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standing in front of a…
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    Parting Words

    A pastor was leaving his area and was saying farewell to his congregation at the Church…
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    Be Careful Following the Crowd

    Another true life story for the Funnies... A new missionary recruit went to Venezuela for…
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    Grandmother on the Stand

    A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial--a…
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    Spelling Help

    My son, Mitchell, a kindergartener, practices spelling with magnetic letters on the…
  • classroom

    Actual Elementary School Excuse Notes

    * "Jerry was at his grandmother's yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because…
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    Johnny Hollers

    Coming through the door after school one day, Little Johnny hollers out, "Okay everyone…
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    Remembering Names

    When I was introduced to a couple visiting our congregation, I decided to remember their…
  • money

    Poor Widow

    A woman's husband dies and she has only $20,000 to her name. After everything is done at…
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    Goober Mechanic

    When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were…
  • curlers

    Hair Curlers

    My wife still uses curlers in her hair after she washes it. The other night she came into…
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    Lariat Training

    More than anything, Bob wanted to be a cowpoke. Taking pity on him, a rancher decided to…
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    40 Year Solution

    My parents have been married for almost 40 years. Whenever anyone asks my Dad how they've…
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    Golf Friendless

    "Bob, why don't you play golf with John anymore?" asked a friend."Would you play golf…
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    Some Great Malapropisms...

    "I don't want anybody stepping on anyone else's thunder.""You can't pull the sheep over…
A young businessman had just started his own firm.  He had just rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques.

Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office.  Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working.

He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments.  Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?"

"Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines."
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