Monthly Archive

July 2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 1837 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2054

The Cowboy's New Car

Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse."I know that smart alec Tex" said the first. "He's going to start bragging about that new foreign car he ought as soon as he gets back""Not Tex" said th... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3599

The Sea

What does the sea say to the sand?Not much. It usually just waves.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2830

Theft Pun

It was reported in today's news that some frosty orange drinks were stolen. The police suspect it is the work of a Julius seizer.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2271

Thesaurus

Thesaurus: ancient reptile with an excellent vocabulary.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3576

Three Little Piggies

Three little piggies went out to dinner one night. The waiter came and took their orders for drinks."I would like a Sprite," said the first little piggy."I would like a glass of Coke," said the second... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3492

Three Pack of Puns mx22

Cat show judge: PurrfectionistDislike of a relative: AuntagonismDifferent place to get married: Altarnative... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2310

Ticket Collection

"What am I supposed to do with this?" grumbled a motorist as the policeman handed him a speeding ticket."Keep it," the cop said, "when you collect four of them you get a bicycle." read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2193

Ticket Explanation

Her car was speeding along Interstate 80 at well over 80 miles an hour when it passed by a State Trooper. Obviously, the officer was compelled to pull the young female driver over and he asked to see ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

6575

Ticket Pun 1

A guy was in court charged with parking in a restricted area. The judge asked him if he had anything to say in his defense."They shouldn't put up such misleading notices," said the guy. "The sign sa... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

4974

Tickle Pun 2

Q: How do you tickle a rich girl?A: Say, "Gucci Gucci Gucci!"... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2403

Tickled

I'm tickled to be the chairman of the Society for People with Super-Sensitive Feet.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

11665

Tie Pun

A man goes into a restaurant and the maitre'd stops him."Sorry sir, you need to wear a tie to enter".So the man goes back to his car and looks around, but there's no necktie to be found. So he takes ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2445

Time Pun

When a clock is hungry, does it go back four seconds?... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2389

Tire Shop Sign

Seen on a sign a a tire shop in Milwaukee:"Invite us to your next blowout."... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2221

Title

"Knocking Your Funny Bone" by O. Howard Hertz read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2670

Today's Market Activity

Helium was up.Feathers were down.Paper was stationary.Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.Knives were up sharply.Cows steered into a bull market.Pencils lost a few points.Hiking equipment w... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2634

Toilet Theft

Police in New Zealand were mystified by the apparent theft of a complete toilet bowl from a police station in Auckland.When a local news reporter asked the police sergeant if they had any leads, he re... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2393

Toilet Training

Toilet training a young child is always a matter of pot luck.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2119

Tolkein Pun

Reading the work of J.R.R. Tolkein is hobbit forming.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2397

Tollboth

When the driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, he plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces. He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

13432

Tomato Pun

A family of three tomatoes were walking downtown one day when the little baby tomato started lagging behind. The big father tomato walks back to the baby tomato, stomps on her, squashing her into a re... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2420

Tomb Visit

I refuse to visit Marx's tomb because it's all just a communist plot.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2596

Too Much Sugar

A fellow nurse at my hospital received a call from an anxious woman. "I'm diabetic and I'm afraid I've had too much sugar today," she said."Are you light-headed?" my colleague asked."No," the caller a... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

4573

Tool Booth Pun

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2934

Towing Sign

Seen on a sign at a Towing Company:"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2252

Toy Store

This weekend while shopping in a local toy store, I came across a long line of people waiting for a promised shipment of dolls from Mattel. As I scanned the line, I noticed a friend waiting with all ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

8362

2 min read

Tractor Pun

As a young boy, Joe was completely obsessed with tractors.He had pictures of tractors all over his bedroom walls; he had tractor toys,tractor T-shirts, a tractor carpet, and duvet cover, the whole wor... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2511

Traffic Court

"The judge had not yet put in an appearance in the San Diego traffic court. When the bailiff entered the courtroom, he sensed the nervousness of the traffic offenders awaiting their ordeal."Good morni read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3069

Travel Pun

Time used to fly; now it's afraid of terrorists.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3055

Tree Pun

We have an old tree that became diseased and was losing its bark. We felt it needed a bark transplant and called a tree surgeon.The communication was mangled and when the surgeon arrived, he went to ... read more..

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