2018 - Monthly Archive - Results from #480

28 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3752

<1min

Confession Tips

The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of th... read more..

28 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2699

<1min

A Likely Story

One of my students could not take my college seminar final exam because of a funeral. "No problem," I told him. "Make it up the following week." That week came, and again he couldn't take the test du... read more..

28 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4090

<1min

Out-of-Office Replies

I don't know about you, but I find those "Out-of-the-Office" e-mail auto-replies very ordinary and tedious. Here are some fun alternatives: 1. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been cha... read more..

26 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1770

<1min

One-liner #1278

I have my doubts about disbelief.... read more..

26 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

2575

<1min

Quote #1720

"Our culture says that feelings of love are the basis for actions of love. And of course that can be true. But it is truer to say that actions of love can lead consistently to feelings of love." - read more..

25 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1181

<1min

Cybersalt News - March 25, 2018

Sunday greetings everyone! A wet start to spring has Rev. James Snyder thinking his wife should be in charge of the weather. You can read "Spring Has Sprung a Leak This Year" at:www.cybersalt.org/god... read more..

24 Mar

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

1968

4 min read

Spring Has Sprung a Leak This Year

It was in the middle of February during a very shivering cold time that the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage said most dramatically, “I can’t wait for Spring. When in the world is Spring going to ge... read more..

24 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

6308

<1min

Comments Never Heard at Church

1. Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew. 2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went 25 minutes over time. 3. Personally I find witnessing much more enjoyab read more..

24 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2943

2 min read

New Family Member

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small Ohio town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our famil... read more..

24 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

2711

<1min

Quote #1719

When they brought the colt to Jesus and threw their cloaks over it, he sat on it. Many people spread their cloaks on the road, while others spread branches they had cut in the fields. Those who went read more..

23 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1933

<1min

One-liner #1277

"Things that upset a chihuahua may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane." - Smiley Blanton read more..

22 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1356

<1min

Cybersalt News - March 22, 2018

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Elephants are often known for their strength, but even they have rough days at work. As proof, check out the larger version of "Elephant Exhaustion" at:www.cybersalt.org/fu... read more..

22 Mar

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1782

<1min

Dew, Cough, Rain...

It's so quiet you can hear a pun drop.... read more..

21 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3346

2 min read

Newlywed Mornings

A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached, they grew apprehensive. Each had a problem they had never before shared with anyone, not even each other. The Groom-to-be, overcoming his fea... read more..

21 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2594

<1min

Racism

Upon being denied, in the 1950's, membership in the exclusive Hollywood Country Club, because he was a Jew, Groucho Marx (whose father was a Jew, but whose mother was not) wrote a letter to the club's... read more..

21 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4338

<1min

Horse Woes

Two cowboy friends, Wally and Dallas, each bought a horse one summer. They enjoyed riding around and doing the things that cowboys do. When winter came, however, they did not want to pay to have their... read more..

21 Mar

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1866

<1min

Translation Friendship

It's hard to connect with my King-James-only buddy... He refuses to receptus my textus.... read more..

21 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

2119

<1min

Quote #1718

"In all the stories of Jesus' compassion, we are never told that he had compassion on someone because they deserved it. It was only because they were in need." - John Ortberg read more..

19 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1788

<1min

One-liner #1276

"Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?" read more..

18 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1209

<1min

Cybersalt News - March 18, 2018

Sunday greetings everyone! This week, Rev. James Snyder's wife left him alone with the microwave oven and a pizza. What could go wrong? You'll know if you read "When I’m beside Myself, I’m in Bad Com... read more..

17 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4351

<1min

Sunday Compliment

The minister gave his Sunday morning service, as usual, but this particular Sunday, it was considerably longer than normal. Later, at the door, shaking hands with parishioners as they moved out, one ... read more..

17 Mar

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3306

<1min

Gray Hair

“When she saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.”... read more..

17 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2303

<1min

Service, Humility, Parenting

We were standing in line outside a busy restaurant. The harried hostess was checking to find out how many people were in each group. "Party of two," the woman behind us said to her, "and could we plea... read more..

When I’m beside Myself, I’m in Bad Company

17 Mar

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

2029

4 min read

When I’m beside Myself, I’m in Bad Company

In the beginning of the week the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage said, “On Thursday the girls and I will be going to St. Augustine for the day to visit thrift shops.” It was spring break and so the... read more..

16 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1640

<1min

One-liner #1275

If you're lucky enough to be Irish... you're lucky enough!... read more..

15 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

2548

<1min

Quote #1717

"The Christian worldview insists that the face of a child with Down syndrome is infinitely more beautiful than an airbrushed model on the cover of a fashion magazine." - Albert Mohler read more..

15 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1279

<1min

Cybersalt News - March 15, 2018

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! I know many of you play Bubble Shooter on the Cybersalt site, but have you tried "Colour Bricks"?www.cybersalt.org/games/colored-bricks Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! ... read more..

14 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

2072

<1min

Quote #1716

"A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal." - Steve Maraboli read more..

How To Survive to the End of a Horror Movie

14 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3683

2 min read

How To Survive to the End of a Horror Movie

How To Survive To The End Of A Horror Movie * When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it's really dead. * Never read a book of demon-summoning verses aloud, even as a... read more..

14 Mar

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1657

<1min

Monthly Possibilities

Can February March? No, but April May.... read more..