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More Jokes

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    Country Refreshment

    A man was on a long walk in the country. He became thirsty so decided to stop at a little…
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    Carried Away Shopping

    In a shop, two men struck up a conversation. Just as one fellow said that his wife was…
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    A Bear, a Lion and a Pig

    A bear, a lion, and a pig meet. I know what your thinking they eat the PIG...NOThe bear…
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    Yes, We Have No Chocolate

    A man goes into an ice cream parlor and says, "I'd like two scoops of chocolate ice…
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    Divy It Up

    Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her…
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    Goober Painter

    Julie, the goober, was getting pretty desperate for money. She decided to go to the…
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    Mommy Test

    I was out walking with my then 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the…
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    Fan Help

    Although I have three sons, it was always my daughter who helped me with chores around…
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    Cat T-Shirts

    If cats wore t-shirts, here is what they might say. "Purrfection cannot be improved" "If…
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    Time To Go

    The pastor was known for the clarity and brevity of his sermons. His talks were well…
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    Awake Tip

    Tech support people like me spend our days on the phone with customers. Many like to chat…
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    Lawyer Light Bulb

    Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?A: Such number as may be deemed…
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    Best Guide

    I understand the fix a local hunting guide got himself into.His party became hopelessly…
  • high tea

    Two Teas

    1st customer: I'll have tea. 2nd customer: Me, too. And be sure the cup is clean! (The…
  • classroom

    Actual Elementary School Excuse Notes

    * "Jerry was at his grandmother's yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because…

AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

BMW
Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Big Money Works
Brutal Money Waster

BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

DODGE
Darn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

FIAT
Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It All the Time
Fix It Again, Tony!

FORD
First On Recall Day
First On Rust and Deterioration
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road, Dead
Fault Of Research & Development
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
backwards -> Driver Returns On Foot

GM
General Maintenance
Got Mistakes

GMC
Garage Man`s Companion
Got A Mechanic Coming?

HONDA
Had One, Never Did Again
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else

HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing`s Driveable And Inexpensive

MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday.
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick`s Irregular Leftover Equipment

SAAB
Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

VW
Virtually Worthless

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