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More Jokes

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    Sunday Lollipop

    The boy came skipping into the house with a big lollipop in his hands. "Where did you get…
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    Surgery Headache

    A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump…
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    Coast Guard Keeping

    My daughter Michelle is the commander of a Coast Guard Cutter. When she gave my husband…
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    Lengthy Discourse

    A visiting minister was very long-winded. Worse, every time he would make a good point…
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    Head First Entry

    A jeweler standing behind the counter of his shop after hours was astounded to see a…
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    Goober Skydiver

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Flu Notes

    (Notes pinned to the pillow of a mother who has the flu by a well-meaning husband who has…
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    Old Dodge

    A man was driving along in his beat up old dodge, when suddenly it broke down. He was…
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    Unknown Reindeer

    The game show contestant was only 200 points behind the leader and about to answer the…
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    Price Reduction

    Our minister announced that admission to a church social event would be six dollars per…
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    First Day Answer

    The child comes home from his first day at school. His Mother asks, "Well, what did you…
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    Bosses Night

    At an annual Bosses Night dinner for Helena, Montana, lawyers, sponsored by legal…
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    Liturgical Response

    In our Anglican church, each service begins with a greeting. The officiating clergyman…
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    Takes One To Know One

    Sitting at a table in the clubhouse after a game, Joe said to a fellow club member, "I'm…
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    Intelligence

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…

AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

BMW
Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Big Money Works
Brutal Money Waster

BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

DODGE
Darn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

FIAT
Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It All the Time
Fix It Again, Tony!

FORD
First On Recall Day
First On Rust and Deterioration
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road, Dead
Fault Of Research & Development
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
backwards -> Driver Returns On Foot

GM
General Maintenance
Got Mistakes

GMC
Garage Man`s Companion
Got A Mechanic Coming?

HONDA
Had One, Never Did Again
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else

HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing`s Driveable And Inexpensive

MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday.
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick`s Irregular Leftover Equipment

SAAB
Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

VW
Virtually Worthless

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