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    Bad Sign

    A little boy just couldn't learn. One day his teacher asked him who signed the…
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    Computer T-Shirt Slogans - #3

    Why doesn't DOS ever say 'EXCELLENT'Shell to DOS, Come in DOS, do you COPY?All computers…
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    Mechanic Rate

    A woman surgeon was disturbed about the high cost of her car repair. "This is…
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    Hymns For The Aging

    *Hymns for the Aging* Precious Lord, Take my Hand (And Help Me Get Up) It is Well with My…
  • lawn ornaments

    Lawn Ornaments

    Customer at a counter of a lawn ornament shop: "Give me four of those pinwheels, two of…
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    Analogies and Metaphors

    These are actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays.- John and Mary had…
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    Murphy's Laws on Computers

    *Murphy's Laws on Computers*- As soon as you delete a worthless file, you'll need it.-…
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    Pull Over

    "Hey you! Pull over!" shouted the traffic cop.The lady complied, and the judge next day…
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    10 Most Wanted

    Little Sammy's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station.…
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    Medical News

    Dr. Mike Wilson asks his patient, "Which do you want first, the good news or the bad…
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    Grocery Pickup

    Soon after my 16-year-old sister started working after school as a grocery-store cashier,…
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    Athletics Anonymous

    These days, with all the emphasis on one's physical fitness, a new organization has…
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    Wakeup Fight

    Following an especially angry argument, Mr. and Mrs. Smith went to bed not speaking to…
  • joggers

    Jogging Time

    A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He…

AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

BMW
Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Big Money Works
Brutal Money Waster

BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

DODGE
Darn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

FIAT
Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It All the Time
Fix It Again, Tony!

FORD
First On Recall Day
First On Rust and Deterioration
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road, Dead
Fault Of Research & Development
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
backwards -> Driver Returns On Foot

GM
General Maintenance
Got Mistakes

GMC
Garage Man`s Companion
Got A Mechanic Coming?

HONDA
Had One, Never Did Again
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else

HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing`s Driveable And Inexpensive

MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday.
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick`s Irregular Leftover Equipment

SAAB
Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

VW
Virtually Worthless

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