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    Murphy's Laws on Computers

    *Murphy's Laws on Computers*- As soon as you delete a worthless file, you'll need it.-…
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    Tax Forms

    It was April and Tax Day was looming when an elderly woman showed up at my desk at the…
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    Airline Announcements

    Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture"…
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    Directions

    A friend was thinking about buying a new house in the country and asked me to come out…
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    Division of Labor

    The Rosenthals had an outstandingly happy and successful marriage, and Mr. Rosenthal was…
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    Walking on Water

    Bob, the goober, heard a rumor that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all…
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    Smile For the DMV

    When I went to get my driver's license renewed, our local motor-vehicle bureau was…
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    Goober Ice Fishing

    A goober wanted to go ice fishing. She'd seen many books on the subject, and finally,…
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    Top Ten Signs You're in for a Long Sermon

    10. There's a case of bottled water beside the pulpit in a cooler. 9. The pews have…
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    Rice Preference

    The young woman really thought she'd been very patient, through a protracted period of…
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    Missing The Obvious

    One day a diver was enjoying the aquatic world 20 feet below sea level. He noticed a guy…
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    Excuses To Give When You Have Missed Work

    Excuses To Give When You Have Missed Work~ I can't come in to work today because I'll be…
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    Rules for Editing

    Some of you have noticed a few typos in the CleanLaugh list now and then. To improve this…
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    All Pro Turkey

    The pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey…
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    Wedding Vows

    A grandmother overheard her 5-year-old granddaughter playing "wedding." The wedding vows…

AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

BMW
Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Big Money Works
Brutal Money Waster

BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

DODGE
Darn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

FIAT
Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It All the Time
Fix It Again, Tony!

FORD
First On Recall Day
First On Rust and Deterioration
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road, Dead
Fault Of Research & Development
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
backwards -> Driver Returns On Foot

GM
General Maintenance
Got Mistakes

GMC
Garage Man`s Companion
Got A Mechanic Coming?

HONDA
Had One, Never Did Again
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else

HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing`s Driveable And Inexpensive

MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday.
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick`s Irregular Leftover Equipment

SAAB
Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

VW
Virtually Worthless

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