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    Age Hat

    In a hat shop a saleslady gushed: "That's the hat for you! It makes you look ten years…
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    Time Management

    The church wanted to help their congregation cope better with the stresses of modern…
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    Office Answering Message

    "Hello, you have reached an office that thought it was so smart getting all it's…
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    Kids and Cliches

    I teach fourth grade in Ventura County, California. As a fun assignment, I gave the…
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    Lost in Bookstore

    A friend and her young son, Reid, were browsing in a large bookstore. Engrossed in making…
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    Passing Time

    My husband and I both look very young for our ages. In fact, we've hardly aged a day…
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    Supermarket Saavy

    One day my brother-in-law noticed an elderly lady slowly pushing a cart through the…
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    School Notes

    The following notes from parents excusing their children from attending school have been…
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    Restaurant Return

    An out-of-towner in New York at the height of the tourist season decided to revisit an…
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    Cooking Terms

    *Cooking Terms*Tongue: A variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the…
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    Scared vs. Apprehension

    As a sergeant in a parachute regiment, I took part in several night-time exercises. Once,…
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    Nature Abhors A Simile

    There was something funny about the kidnapping crime scene that Special Agent Frievald…
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    Cinderoofer

    When my children received the video of Cinderella as a summer gift, they watched it…
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    Reading Glasses

    I took my 5 year old grandson to the optometrist to pick up his new glasses. The glasses…
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    Career Cooling

    Once I worked as an operator on an old IBM 370/Model 138 mainframe at a local college. My…

1.  After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair.  As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin.  At last she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings.  As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

2.  A mother was telling her little girl what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond.  I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard.  We rode our pony.  We picked wild raspberries in the woods."
The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in.  At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

3.  My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?"!  I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are we alike?" "You're both old," he replied.

4.  A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father's word processor.  She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."

5.  I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her.  I would point out something and ask what color it was.  She would tell me, and always she was correct.  But it was fun for me, so I continued.  At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these yourself!"

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