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More Jokes

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    Goober Counsellor

    A goober began a job as an elementary school counsellor, and she was eager to help. One…
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    Baby Talk

    What your baby would tell you if he could talk:1. I have my blankie, you have your…
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    Correct Response

    While in an instrument flight-training class at Reese Air Force Base, Texas, I dozed off…
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    Nail Biting

    Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it’s biting my…
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    Football Confessions

    Our assistant pastor, an avid football fan, had to hear confessions on Saturday during an…
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    Goober Guess

    This goober named Jed was walking down the road one day when he came across his friend,…
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    New Pope

    A high school history teacher was discussing the funeral of the Pope with his class. One…
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    Battery Life

    An angry motorist went back to a garage where he had purchased an expensive battery for…
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    With Friends Like That...

    A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in two's for the day. That night one…
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    Pain Cause

    A little girl went up to her mother one day while holding her stomach saying, "Mommy, my…
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    New Windows Error Messages

    Smash forehead on keyboard to continue. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue.…
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    Golden Bear Answer

    A reporter was interviewing Jack Nicklaus. He said, "Jack, you are spectacular, your name…
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    Teaching Math

    Last week I purchased a burger for $1.58. I handed the cashier $2.00 and started digging…
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    Medical Opinions

    A patient complained to his doctor, "I've been to three other doctors and none of them…
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    Lingering Hug

    We had made some changes in our lives. My husband had lost 50 pounds and after eight…

"Mom's List Of Things She Does Not Want To Hear"

1. I swallowed the goldfish.

2. Your lipstick works better than crayons.

3. Does grape juice leave a stain?

4. The principal called...

5. But DAD says that word all the time!

6. What's it cost to fix a window?

7. Has anyone seen my earthworms?

8. I painted your shoes pretty, huh Mommy?

9. The dog doesn't like dressing up in your underwear.

10. I'm running away from home. (Well, maybe some days.)

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