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    Super Dress

    Shortly after the birth of their second child, a husband offered to take his wife…
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    Good Old Days

    Grandpa was always going on about the good old days, and the lower cost of living, in…
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    First Day Answer

    The child comes home from his first day at school. His Mother asks, "Well, what did you…
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    Fire Test

    Joey and his classmates had just finished a tour of the local fire hall. Before each…
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    Company Role Models

    My company had a successful year, and at the annual meeting, employees eagerly awaited…
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    Happy Birthday Grandpa

    My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I…
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    Sauce Control Center

    Becky prepared a pasta dish for a dinner party she was giving. In her haste, however, she…
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    Losing Load

    A trucker stops for red light and a goober girl catches up. She knocks on the door and…
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    Things to do when seeing Lord Of The Rings:

    1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait! Where is Harry Potter?"2.…
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    Late For Class

    At the prestigious university there was a clear hierarchy that outlined how long one was…
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    Work Confusion

    A passerby noticed a couple of city workers working along the city sidewalks.The man was…
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    Suck It In

    I noticed my husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his ample stomach.…
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    Goodwill Offering

    During the last Sunday service that the visiting pastor was to spend at the church he…
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    Cell Phone Find

    An employee of the airport found a cell phone in one of the boarding areas. She switched…
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    Called In Sick

    Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse. The union…

1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait! Where is Harry Potter?"

2. Block the entrance to the theater while screaming, "YOU.....SHALL....NOT..... PASS!"

3. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts.

4. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mis..ter Ander-sonnn."

5. When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and at the top of your lungs sing, "And I did it.... MY way!"

6. Talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, bite off someone's finger and fall down the stairs.

7. Dress up as old ladies and reenact "The Battle of Helms Deep," Monty Python style.

8. When Denethor lights the fire, shout "Barbecue!"

9. In TTT when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout, "RUN FOREST, RUN!"

10. Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien about!"

11. During a wide shot of a battle, inquire, "Where's Waldo?"

12. Start an Orc sing-a-long.

13. Come to the premiere dressed as Frankenfurter and wander around looking terribly confused.

14. When they go in the paths of the dead, wait for a tense moment and shout, "I see dead people!"

15. Imitate what you think a conversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda would be like.

16. Release a jar of daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.

17. Wonder out loud if Aragorn is going to run for governor of California.

18. When Shelob comes on, exclaim, "Man! Charlotte's really let herself go!"

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