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More Jokes

  • airport security

    Packing

    I was scheduled to fly from North Carolina to Germany, where my husband was stationed in…
  • cake chocolate2

    Finishing

    My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So…
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    Lion Tamer

    A man told the ringmaster that he was interested in joining the circus as a lion tamer.…
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    Sermon Interpretation

    One Sunday after church Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. Her…
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    Prescription Labels

    A pharmacy major was taking a course in Dispensing. One day they were discussing the…
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    Look Like Mom

    A two-and-a-half-year-old walked into the bathroom while her mother was putting on…
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    Cheap Hearing Aid

    A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much…
  • pay phone

    Listening In

    A long time ago, before the days of cell phones, I needed to call home, and the only pay…
  • picture of a serious sister

    Chose Your Weapon

    Nine-year-old Aaron came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn…
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    Science Quotes from Kids - Part 2

    ~ H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.~ To collect fumes of sulfur, hold a deacon…
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    Strange 911 Calls

    *Strange 911 Calls*A call came into 911 Emergency because two couples were going to share…
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    The Night of Tax Day

    Twas the night of Tax Day, and all thru the house,Every creature was whirring, even the…
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    ID Card

    The day I immigrated to the United States, I was given an alien ID card that featured a…
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    More To Think About

    * Ever Wondered Why ....???? If you're not supposed to drink and drive, then why do bars…
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    Dads and Babies

    My two daughters were having a discussion about family resemblance. "I look like Mom,"…
1.  Blaming your gas on me....  Not Funny

2.  Yelling at me for barking.  I am a dog you goober.

3.  Taking me for a walk then not letting me check stuff out.  Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

4.  Any trick balancing food on my nose....  Stop it.

5.  Yelling at me for rubbing myself on your carpet.  Why did you buy carpet?

6.  Getting upset when I sniff crotches of your guests.  Sorry but I haven't quite mastered the handshake thing yet.

7.  Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons.  Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you are not home.

8.  Taking me to the vet for "The big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back.

9.  Dog Sweaters

10.  The slight of hand, fake fetch throws.  You fooled a dog!  What a proud moment for you on the top of the food chain.
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