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More Jokes

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    Dining In

    My husband and I both work, so our family eats out a lot.Recently, when we were having a…
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    Cinnamon Rolls

    At breakfast one day, I eagerly waited for my husband to comment on my first attempt at…
  • public speaking

    PTA Speakers

    As a traffic safety consultant, I often gave talks to organizations on accident…
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    Good Doctors

    A fellow was asked if there were any good doctors is his home town. "Good doctors!" he…
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    Doctor in the House

    A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, "Please, is there a doctor in…
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    Cow Predictions

    A midwest farmer was describing his lifestyle to a touring group of city folks. "One of…
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    Husband's Estimate

    Joe's wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years…
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    Dalmation Role

    A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a…
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    Lost, Found Changed

    A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of Christmas shopping. It was found by an honest…
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    Helpful Executive

    A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing…
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    Reading Glasses

    I took my 5 year old grandson to the optometrist to pick up his new glasses. The glasses…
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    Vacation Report

    Christmas Break was over and the teacher was asking the class about their vacations. She…
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    Isn't Aging Fun?

    Do you realize that the only time in our liveswhen we like to get old is when we're…
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    Microsoft TV Dinner

    Instructions for Microsoft's TV Dinner:You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing…
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    Behavior Modification

    One morning I was called to pick up my son at the school nurse's office.When I walked…
1.  Blaming your gas on me....  Not Funny

2.  Yelling at me for barking.  I am a dog you goober.

3.  Taking me for a walk then not letting me check stuff out.  Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

4.  Any trick balancing food on my nose....  Stop it.

5.  Yelling at me for rubbing myself on your carpet.  Why did you buy carpet?

6.  Getting upset when I sniff crotches of your guests.  Sorry but I haven't quite mastered the handshake thing yet.

7.  Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons.  Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you are not home.

8.  Taking me to the vet for "The big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back.

9.  Dog Sweaters

10.  The slight of hand, fake fetch throws.  You fooled a dog!  What a proud moment for you on the top of the food chain.
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