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More Jokes

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    Family Cleaning

    Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed…
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    Today's Little Axioms

    1. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.2. He who laughs last, thinks…
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    Hooked Shot

    Jack was first up in his foursome. Eyeing the ball, he swung his club and hooked his shot…
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    Bathroom Break

    On the first day of school, about mid-morning, the kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone…
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    Priceless Grandparent Stories - Part 2

    6. A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to discuss…
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    The End of Speeding?

    A speeding motorist was caught by radar from a police helicopter in the sky. An officer…
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    Hitchhiker Problem

    John was driving home late one night when he picked up a hitchhiker.As they rode along he…
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    Hospital Information

    A friend of mine was in the hospital awaiting the arrival of her first child. When I…
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    House Points

    "This house," said the real estate salesman, "has both its good points and its bad…
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    Taps System

    During an attack of laryngitis I lost my voice completely for two days. To help me…
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    Show and Tell

    I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best…
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    Cake Make Up

    On Coast Guard cutters, low-ranking crewmembers take turns in the galley helping the…
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    Swim of Love

    Once there was a millionaire who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in…
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    Can Cure

    A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable cold. His doctor…
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    Awake Tip

    Tech support people like me spend our days on the phone with customers. Many like to chat…

giftTop 10 things to say about a holiday gift you don't like:

10) Hey! There's a gift.

9.) Well, well, well...

8.) Boy, if I had not recently shot up 4 sizes, that would've fit.

7.) Perfect for wearing in the basement.

6.) Wow, I hope this never catches fire!

5.) If the dog buries it, I'll be furious!

4.) I Love it, but I fear the jealousy it will inspire.

3.) Sadly, tomorrow I enter the federal witness protection program.

2.) To think I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts to charity.

1.) I really don't deserve this.

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