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    Sayings About Aging

    Thoughts on Growing Old ~ Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else…
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    Elevator Repair

    Soon after our high-tech company moved into a new building, we had trouble with the…
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    Money Worries

    Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a want ad for an accountant. He was…
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    Overdrawn

    While waiting in line at the bank, a co-worker developed a very loud case of hiccups. By…
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    Exam By Chance

    A young student reports for a final examination that consists of only true/false type…
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    Dental Mommy

    For the first time, my four-year-old daughter Kelsey was coming to my office to have me,…
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    Golf Questions

    Jill: I just don't understand the attraction golf holds for men.Nadine: TELL me about it!…
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    Home For The Holidays

    A student was heading home for the holidays.When she got to the airline counter, she…
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    Art Good News/Bad News

    An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on…
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    As Long As We Are One

    My grandson was telling me that he and his three playmates attended different…
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    Check The List

    Planning a Christmas weekend of entertaining guests, I made a list of things I needed to…
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    Out of This World Bait

    My daughter-in-law Alma and grandson Eddy were digging for fishing bait in my garden.…
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    Living to 104

    At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked if he planned to be around for his…
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    Swanky Dining

    The couple entered the resort's swanky dining room. "I'm sorry," apologized the Maitre d,…
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    Turkey Hotline

    TRUE STORIES FROM THE BUTTERBALL Turkey Hotline, where people call to get advice on how…
1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

2. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

3. Someday, we?ll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

4. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

5. Ahhh ... I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...

6. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

7. How about never? Is never good for you?

8. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

9. I don't know what your problem is, but I?ll bet it's hard to pronounce.

10. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

11. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!

12. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

13. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

14. No, my powers can only be used for good.

15. You sound reasonable ... time to up my medication.

16. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!

17. I?ll try being nicer if you?ll try being smarter.

18. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

19. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

20. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.

21. Who me? I just wander from room to room.

22. It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
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