A man and his ten-year-old son were on a fishing trip miles from home. At the boy's insistence, they decided to attend the Sunday worship service at a small rural church. The father forgot to bring any cash, so he reached in his pocket and gave his son a dime to drop in the offering plate as it was passed.
As they walked back to their car after the service, the father complained. "The service was too long," he lamented. "The sermon was boring, and the singing was off key."
Finally the boy said, "Daddy, I thought it was pretty good for a dime."
"If being hurt by church causes you to lose faith in God, then your faith was in people not in God."
- Larry Bluford Jr.
~ Never squat with your spurs on!
~ Never kick a fresh cow chip on a hot day.
~ There's two theories to arguin' with a woman....
Neither one works.
~ Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew.
Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger than you think.
~ If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
~ After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
A sick man turned to his doctor, as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said, "Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side."
Very quietly, the doctor said, "I don't know."
"You don't know? You, a Christian man, do not know what is on the other side?"
The doctor was holding the handle of the door; on the other side of which came a sound of scratching and whining, and as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room and leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.
Turning to the patient, the doctor said, "Did you notice my dog? He's never been in this room before. He didn't know what was inside. He knew nothing, except that his master was here, and when the door opened, he sprang in without fear. I know little of what is on the other side. I know my Master Jesus Christ is there, and that is enough."
"This is God's universe, and God does things His way.
You may have a better way, but you don't have a universe."
- Vernon McGee
Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
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