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Letters

Dear Pastor Tim,

I have been on your clean laugh list for what must be over a year now.  It remains a blessing to me to open a clean and cheerful email from you every morning.  Your site is truly salt and light on the net!!

I have just been listening to your 'Tsunami Souls' (Listen Here) as I finish packing my bags here in my home in New Zealand in preparation for flying out tomorrow to do aid & relief work among the tribal groups along the coast of Southern Thailand.  I just want to thank you for your message, it has been a real source of encouragement and motivation for me at a time when my head is too full of too many thoughts.  The reality and the simplicity of the message of Jesus Christ and the cross really brings everything else back into focus.

I grew up on the island of Phuket where my parents worked as . . .

Pastor Tim, who are you voting for in the upcoming federal election?

Signed, Weye Bawther

Dear Weye,

I am going to vote for the candidate and/or party that I feel most moved by my Christian convictions to vote for (or perhaps least convicted to not vote for).  I'm not trying to avoid answering your question (as if I were running for office or something).  Rather, as a pastor I feel it is important to not risk alienating people in our church and city who may be of a different political stripe than I am.  After all, the Word of God applies to people of every political slant or lean and therefore as a servant of God I do not want to in anyway compromise others? ability to see me as anything other than that.

In response to the following joke (Telegram Scare):

Schwartz and Feldman, partners in the garment industry, had just suffered through their worst season ever. Eight thousand madras sports coats were hanging on the rack unsold, and bankruptcy was looming closer each day.

Out of the blue, in walked a buyer from Australia. "I say there," he began, "you boys wouldn't happen to have any madras sports coats, would you? I've been looking for them everywhere."

Schwartz said there MIGHT be a few left, and soon a deal was made whereby the eight thousand jackets would be . . .

In response to the funny picture I posted at:
https://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh/images/04/grandmaslots.htm

The following entry was submitted to my guestbook (I've used their initials so they don't totally fall out of their tree):

You claim to be a Christian but yet post a picture calling it humor of your grandmother in front of a slot machine in Las Vegas.  Tsk ..tsk.  What a mixed message that brings.  I could quote you a number of scriptures but you're probably one of those "liberal" Christians that says "it ain't harming no one but Granny ..  and that's only if she loses money ..  it's the only thing she enjoys since Grandpa dies." Gambling is a SIN!  You're telling people on a CHRISTIAN website that it's OKAY to gamble.  Wo...

- M. L.

On July 14, 2004, I missed a vulgar word in the PearlyGates item I sent out.

To apologize and clarify, I sent out the following note (be aware that the missed word appears in print twice below).

Pastor Tim Wrote:

Dear PearlyGates Subscribers,

Well, imagine my surprise at the end of the day, just when I went to send out another day’s posts, that I had a bunch of e-mails concerned about a word in one of my mailings. My first thought? – “Man, what did I miss this time?” So, to varying degrees and to different kinds of people I offer the following (in the pseudo-comedic form of Craig Kilborn's “To Blank With Love.”

Subcategories

Hall of Flames - Pastor Tim's Hate MailThe world (and unfortunately some churches) have many discontented people and spiritual bullies. So when you try to uplift, entertain and encourage people, (and maybe even make them laugh) it only stands to reason that every now and then someone is going to go off the deep end on you. On the internet that deep end usually manifests itself through a vitrious and gall filled e-mail sent so the author can get his/her jollies by blasting you (otherwise known as a "flame").

Here is a collection of some of the more entertaining flames I have received. Don't worry about me. I've been around enough to know that such people come with the territory. Only, my approach is different that most other's. Most usually just get quiet or apologize in order to either placate the flamer and avoid getting burned up totally.

Me, I'd rather have a good laugh at their expense (after all I didn't make them type what they typed) and, in the case where they may attend the church I pastor, tell them to straighten up or go find another church to wreck.

Nobody eats sheep while this shepherd is on duty!

I like it when people make me laugh.  Here are some of the funnier letters I have gotten from list members/visitors.
Answers to some of the questions Pastor Tim has been asked - or should have been asked.

To quote actress Sally Field,
"You like me.? You really like me!"

Here are some of the notes of appreciation?I have received.

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