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Monthly Archive

March 2019

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 53 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
331

Cybersalt News - March 31, 2019

Sunday greetings everyone! At risk of making this sound like groundhog day, I think sending is back to normal. This week, Rev. James Snyder reminisces about the positive effect corporal punishment h... read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
834

I Don’t Miss My Teacher’s Hickory Stick, but She Never Did

I am not sure why I think of some things, however, every occasionally I remember something that happened a million years ago. Or so it seems. This week for some reason, I hap... read more..

Quotes
Susan Davis
804

Quote #1809

"I take refuge in the fact that while I don't know everything, I do know Someone who does!" - A.W. Tozer read more..

Clean Puns
Susan Davis
931

Feed the Ox

Go ahead and give your pastor a bonus based on church growth... it will bring a new meaning to the words Great Commission.... read more..

One-liners
Susan Davis
637

One-liner #1367

"I am myself, and I'm going to continue to play that role!" - Richard Nixon read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3014

Crossing the Road

There's a man trying to cross the street. As he steps off the curb a car comes screaming around the corner and heads straight for him. The man walks faster, trying to hurry across the street, but the... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
676

Shopping Manners

One of the busiest times for a meat-department manager in a supermarket occurs when there is a sale on particular cuts. When we put cross-rib roasts on sale one day the result was predictable. I'd br... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1200

Quote #1808

"Patience is not about how long you wait, it is about how well you behave while you are waiting." - Unknown read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
690

One-liner #1366

I used to think that marriage was a 50 - 50 proposition ... until I realized that I knew nothing about women or fractions. - Walter McLauren... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
762

Places to Go

I've been to a lot of places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone, you have to be in Cahoots with someone. I've also never been in Cognito either. I hear no one recognizes ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3051

Excuses To Give When You Have Missed Work

~ I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. Okay? ~ I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile leprosy, but I know we have that ... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
588

Grad School Romance

Dave took Mary out for a romantic dinner where the conversation turned to the subject of marriage. Dave had been saving for an engagement ring, but he was in graduate school and in dire need of a new ... read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
5742

Learn To Recognize The Source of All Blessings

In 1978, I was ordained to the gospel ministry. To mark this special event, my parents surprised me with a new 1977 Dodge Aspen, the most spectacular present I ever received. It was white, with a red ... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
367

Cybersalt News - March 21, 2019

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Also, happy Spring/Fall depending on the hemisphere you live in! And the visits continue; our daughter and grandson just left after a 2-week visit and now we are enjoying a... read more..

Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
9732

How Not to Pass Your Driving Test

How Not To Pass Your Driving Test Turn the radio on.  When the tester goes to turn it off slap his/her hand. Rev the car really high, turn to the tester, and say with an evil look, "Buckle up... read more..

Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
2716

These Don't Go Together

Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations do not go together: A nose ring and bifocals Spiked hair and bald spots A pierced tongue and dentures Miniskirts and sup... read more..

Quotes
Susan Davis
1442

Quote #1807

"Be selective in your battles; sometimes peace is better than being right." - Unknown read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5489

Captain Discipline

About 90 fifth-graders piled into the airliner I was flying, on their way home from a school trip. Once we were in the air, and the crew began serving drinks, I could hear them pleading with the chil... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
651

Meeting Expectations

Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised for a manservant. The next morning a nicely dressed young man came to the front door. "Can you start the breakfast by seven o'clock?" ask... read more..

Clean Puns
Susan Davis
761

Woodn't You Know

Tree puns: always poplar!... read more..

One-liners
Susan Davis
722

One-liner #1365

Even though I don't say so, I think you stink!... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
317

Cybersalt News - March 17, 2019

Sunday greetings everyone! I think technology and lack of sleep things have settled down here at Cybersalt World Headquarters. Today's mailing will hopefully go out and arrive according to ... read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
602

The Question of the Disappearing Ice Cream

A mystery has developed within the halls of our once peaceful domicile. At first, I did not think too seriously about it. Some things, if left alone usually take care of themselves. Of course, there a... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2958

Synthetic Diamond

An Irishman by the name of O'Mally proposed to his girl on St. Patrick's Day. He gave her a ring with a synthetic diamond. The excited young lass showed it to her father, a jeweler. He took one look a... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3074

Crate of Chickens

The farmer's son was returning from the market with a crate of chickens his father had entrusted to him when all of a sudden the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different directions... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
747

Script Ungratefulness

A man writing at the post office desk was approached by an older fellow with a postcard in his hand. The old man said, "Sir, I'm sorry to bother you but could you address this postcard for me? My art... read more..

Quotes
Susan Davis
893

Quote #1806

"When my productivity was removed from my spirituality, I learned how beloved we are - apart from what we can do or accomplish for God." - Sarah Bessey read more..

One-liners
Susan Davis
654

One-liner #1364

Acupuncture is pointless.... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
311

Cybersalt News - March 14, 2019

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Remember how I described last Wednesday was a doozy here at Cybersalt World Headquarters?  Well yesterday was another one. I'm getting old fast enough with h... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
768

Honest Aging

My youngest son asked me how old I was. I answered, "39 and holding." He thought for a moment and then asked, "But how old would you be if you let go?"... read more..

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