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    Diet Skipping

    Mr. Lee was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. "I want you to eat…
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    Plane Pontoons

    Tiring of the inconvenience of the drive from airport to country cottage, a man equipped…
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    High Blood Pressure

    A woman goes to the doctor for her yearly physical. The nurse starts with certain basic…
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    Computer Error

    I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Harold, the computer guy, to come…
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    Thoughts On Genealogy

    *Thoughts On Genealogy*~ Genealogy: Tracing yourself back to better people.~ I trace my…
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    Noise Abatement

    "Flight 1234," the control tower advised, "turn right 45 degrees for noise…
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    Wacky Definitions

    Gravity: Not just a good idea, it's the law!Gross ignorance: 144 times worse than normal…
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    Riding With Grandma

    One evening I was driving my eight-year-old daughter to her grandparents' home for an…
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    More Strange Warnings

    Here are some more strange warnings on items.On a packet of juggling balls:"This product…
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    Flight Booking

    After booking my 80-year-old grandmother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the…
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    Votive Candles

    Visiting St Patrick's Cathedral on a tour of New York City, my daughter and her children…
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    College Nerves

    While touring the University with some college-bound friends, I saw an advertisement that…
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    Texas Vacation

    A couple was relating their vacation experiences to a friend. "It sounds as if you had a…
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    Size 8 Shoes

    A guy walks into a shoe store and asks for a pair of shoes, size 8. The obviously well…
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    When One Shows Up

    A preacher prepared for Sunday morning service, but only one person, a farmer, was there.…

Dangling Participle Alert!

~ The burglar was about 30 years old, white, 5' 10", with wavy hair weighing about 150 pounds.

~ The family lawyer will read the will tomorrow at the residence of Mr. Hannon, who died June 19 to accommodate his relatives.

~ Mrs. Shirley Baxter, who went deer hunting with her husband, is very proud that she was able to shoot a fine buck as well as her husband.

~ Organ donations from the living reached a record high last year, outnumbering donors who are dead for the first time.

~ The dog was hungry and made the mistake of nipping a 2-year-old that was trying to force feed it in his ear.

~ We spent most of our time sitting on the back porch watching the cows playing Scrabble and reading.

~ Hunting can also be dangerous, as in the case of pygmies hunting elephants armed only with spears.

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