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More Jokes

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    Historical Application

    Steinberg needs a job, and has no qualms about inventing the necessary qualifications to…
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    Alternative Baptism

    As a young preacher, my small church had limited facilities, so we held baptisms in a…
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    Directions

    A friend was thinking about buying a new house in the country and asked me to come out…
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    Cafeteria Sign

    Children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch. At the head of…
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    Kidnapped

    Most Friday nights at the Naval Station in Bermuda, we would assemble at the officers…
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    Pull Over

    "Hey you! Pull over!" shouted the traffic cop.The lady complied, and the judge next day…
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    Orchestra Note

    While a famous orchestra was on tour, the conductor found this note under his hotel room…
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    Phonetic Hymn Title

    Many hymnals have a hymn called "Gladly the Cross I'd Bear."It seems that one week when…
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    Web Addiction Holiday Sing Along

    Web Addiction Holiday Sing Along!(Sung to the tune of "Winter Wonderland")Doorbell rings,…
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    Sunday Service

    A minister was planning a wedding at the close of the Sunday morning service.After the…
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    Size 8 Shoes

    A guy walks into a shoe store and asks for a pair of shoes, size 8. The obviously well…
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    Family Records

    The following was overheard at a recent high society party..."My ancestry goes all the…
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    Dog Sweater

    In an upscale pet-supply store, a customer wanted to buy a red sweater for her dog.The…
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    Gladys Pun

    There was this lady who was visiting a church one Sunday. The sermon seemed to go on…
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    Lawyer Son

    When my mother was called for jury duty, she felt confident of her Ability to answer the…

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Energizer Bunny arrested -- charged with battery.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

Beat the 5 o'clock rush, leave work at noon!

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

There's no future in time travel.

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

Smith & Wesson -- the original point and click interface.

Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.

Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my hard disk?

Corduroy pillows -- they're making headlines!

All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.

Polynesia -- memory loss in parrots.

Oh Lord give me patience, and give it to me NOW!

A good pun is it's own reword.

Laughing stock -- cattle with a sense of humor

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

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