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  • children play

    Wills Explained

    I was in my wills and trusts course when the professor posed this question to the…
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    Seeing Eye Dog

    A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing eye dog one day. When they come to…
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    Moving Smith

    Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office."Boss," he says, "we're doing some…
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    Parenting Test

    MESS TEST Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the Wet…
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    Golf Hole

    A young minister and Mr. Sims, an elderly parishioner, were playing golf. The minister's…
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    Politcal Quotes

    "I resent your insinuendoes." "If we don't make some changes, the status quo will remain…
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    Coverup Catch

    This guy had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without…
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    Utensil Rejection

    My friend Ann and I were eating at a Chinese restaurant. When an elderly waiter set…
  • police pull over

    Speedy Comeback

    The cop got out of his car and the kid, that was stopped for speeding, rolled down his…
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    Getting Ready

    A man pacing back and forth glanced at his watch and yelled upstairs to his wife, "Honey,…
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    Trojan Virus Warning

    Hey Hector, This was forwarded to me by Cassandra--it looks legit. Please distribute to…
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    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow

    Ten Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow1. Text on Web pages displays…
  • child pray

    Pray Loud

    Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys…
  • garage

    Signs Your Garage Needs to be Cleaned

    - It just entered itself in the heavyweight division on BattleBots. - I don't care what…
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    Goober Mechanic

    When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were…

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Energizer Bunny arrested -- charged with battery.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

Beat the 5 o'clock rush, leave work at noon!

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

There's no future in time travel.

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

Smith & Wesson -- the original point and click interface.

Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.

Who is General Failure, and why is he reading my hard disk?

Corduroy pillows -- they're making headlines!

All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.

Polynesia -- memory loss in parrots.

Oh Lord give me patience, and give it to me NOW!

A good pun is it's own reword.

Laughing stock -- cattle with a sense of humor

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

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