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More Jokes

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    Rental Description

    On duty as a customer-service rep for a car-rental company, I took a call from a driver…
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    Things to do when seeing Lord Of The Rings:

    1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait! Where is Harry Potter?"2.…
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    Great Exercise Program

    Here's the exercise program I'm using to stay in shape this year. You might want to take…
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    Why Some Countries CAN'T Go Metric

    If the metric system did ever take over, we'd have to change our thinking to the…
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    Enjoyment of Food

    Old Abraham was a poor tailor whose shop was next door to a very upscale French…
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    Strange 911 Calls

    *Strange 911 Calls*A call came into 911 Emergency because two couples were going to share…
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    Vacuum Persuasion

    My sister has the courage--but not always the skills--to tackle any home-repair…
  • A dad gives his daughter getting a shoulder ride.

    But Daddy

    My husband and I took our two-year-old daughter to the home-improvement store. Madison…
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    DIY Complications

    The middle-aged man was shuffling along, bent over at the waist, as his wife helped him…
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    Vacation Offer

    A newspaper writer, after working for 17 long years, was finally granted two months…
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    Parrot Auction

    One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this…
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    Immigrations Card

    Some years ago an Englishman on a plane to Australia was handed one of those…
  • law offices

    Lawyer Questions

    The following questions from lawyers (and answers from witnesses) were taken from…
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    Unfinished Quest

    Long, long ago an old Indian chief was about to die, so he called for Geronimo and…
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    No Gun Hunting

    There's this guy who shows up at a cabin where these hunters have gathered to hunt bear.…
Cat door retro-fitted with garage door opener.

Confused guests constantly mistaking him for a beanbag chair.

Fifteen month gestation period, and still no kittens.

No longer cleans self unless coated in Cheese Whiz.

Catfood dish replaced with a trough.

Luxurious, shiny black fur replaced with mint green polyester pantsuit.

It's no longer safe to lift him without a spotter.

She only catches mice that get trapped in her gravitational pull.

Has more chins than lives.
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