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    Diamond Assumption

    An acquaintance of mine, whose daughter was about to be married, decided to give her a…
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    The Next One

    After a young couple brought their new baby home, the wife suggested that her husband…
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    Sarahrella

    After watching the movie Cinderella, five-year-old Sarah started using her pinwheel as a…
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    Potential Company Mergers

    Xerox and Wurlitzer: They're going to make reproductive organs Fairchild Electronics and…
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    Let Us Know

    The following advertisement appeared in a physical culture magazine:"Here's a good test…
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    Hiring Slogans

    Beware of Companies With These Hiring Slogans:"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY": We have no…
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    PICNIC Problem

    Looking over the log book kept by the computer support staff at my office, I noticed…
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    Transcribing Confusion

    We were thoroughly confused. While transcribing medical audiotapes, my co-worker came…
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    Call For A Ride

    Jill's car was unreliable and she called John for a ride every time it broke down. One…
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    Color Blind

    Checking out of the grocery store, I noticed that the bag boy was eyeing my two adopted…
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    Sports Injury

    Giving a man his physical, a doctor noticed several dark, ugly bruises on his shins, so…
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    How To Know When You Are Ready For Parenthood

    How To Know When You Are Ready For ParenthoodMESS TEST: Smear peanut butter on the sofa…
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    Kids' Instructions for Life

    Never trust a dog to watch your food. Patrick, Age 10 When you want something expensive,…
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    Parachute Charity

    I volunteered recently to perform a parachute jump for charity. On our first day of…

1.  The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.

2.  You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

3.  The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.

4.  There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

5.  People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

6.  If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

7.  The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people who are not in them.

8.  You should not confuse your career with your life.

9.  A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter/janitor, is not a nice person.

10.  When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command.
Very often, that individual is crazy.

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