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    Overdue Rent

    Walpole had lived in his loft for six months, and by now it was filled with the paintings…
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    Stain Glass

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    Last Marathon

    Last year I entered the New York City Marathon. The race started and immediately I was…
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    Money

    Money can buy a house, but not a home.Money can buy a bed, but not sleep.Money can buy a…
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    Military Man

    A career military man, who had retired as a Master Sergeant, was telling the new recruits…
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    Goober Operator

    My daughter called me at work to say I was to phone Ian at my bank. When I called, the…
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    Learned From a Snowman

    "All I Need to Know about Life I Learned From a Snowman.... " --It's okay if you're a…
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    Valentine's Day

    After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl…
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    Fire Test

    Joey and his classmates had just finished a tour of the local fire hall. Before each…
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    Good News

    *Good News* The parachute company says you'll get a full refund. They say the house…
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    Kids' Kitchen Terms

    Kids' Kitchen TermsBOIL: The point a parent reaches upon hearing the automatic "Yuck"…
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    Looking For The Lift

    As a concierge at a posh resort, I was often asked about the ski facilities. One day a…
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    When I Was Your Age

    A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one…
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    Medical Bill Call

    Many patients call the pathology group where I am office manager to discuss their medical…
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    Reasons You Should Buy a New Car

    Reasons You Should Buy a New Car:- Your passenger seat is on the National Register of…

1.  The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.

2.  You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

3.  The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.

4.  There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

5.  People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

6.  If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

7.  The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people who are not in them.

8.  You should not confuse your career with your life.

9.  A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter/janitor, is not a nice person.

10.  When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command.
Very often, that individual is crazy.

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