Entertainment
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A technician followed her onto the elevator, wheeling a large, intimidating looking machine with tubes and wires and dials.
"Boy, would I hate to be hooked up to that thing," she said.
"So would I," replied the technician. "It's a floor-cleaning machine."
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At my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary, I was looking through a photo album of their marriage ceremony. "Grandma, so many of these styles have come back over the years," I commented.
Grandma never hesitated. "That's why I've kept Grandpa all this time," she said. "I know he'll be back in style again one of these days."
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Admittedly, I realize some of you may not think this is a very fun link. Even just the talk of caskets can wreck some people's day.
However, the whole idea of an art casket seems to bring a lighter sense to the thought of funeral planning. Many people have tried to put "fun" into funerals and I doubt that can really be accompished in its truest sense at most memorial services. But a racing casket with a checkered flag might just brighten the whole episode up a bit.
As a pastor, I can say that I've seen a lot weirder things at funerals. I'd tell you about the two times I've had to bury people twice, but that's another story on the riverbank.
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"Who is the most obedient?" he asked.
"Who never talks back to mother?"
"Who does everything she says?"
Five small voices answered in unison, "Okay, dad, you get the toy."
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He was constantly pestering the pastor to give him some work that would be helpful to the church. Finally the pastor agreed. He gave the man a list of ten people who hadn't been in church for years nor made any financial contribution. Some of these were quite prominent in the community.
The pastor said, "What I want you to do is get these people back to church, however you can. You can use church stationery if you want, but get these people back to church."
Three weeks later the pastor got an envelope in the mail from a prominent doctor whose name had been on the list, along with a check for $1,000 and a note that read, "Dear Pastor, Please excuse my inactivity at church. I really have no excuse. Accept this check as a partial contribution for all the Sundays I've missed, and be assured I will never, by choice, miss worship again.
Sincerely, J. B. Jones, M.D.
P.S. - Will you kindly tell your secretary that there is only one "t" in dirty and no "c" in skunk?"
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An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President
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We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
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Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
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The Best Kept Secret Ever!
An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President
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Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
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